Friday, December 23, 2011

England

My family is stationed in England and for my present this year they bought me and my hubby a ticket to the madness of Christmas.

Wouldn't you know it but things were a pain right off the bat. Our seats were in the very back of the plane and couldn't lean back; at all. The little tv in the seat in front of me had been assaulted by one too many fussy 4 year olds and wouldn't register half of what I tried to tell it to do. Our plan landed an hour early. They made me go into that stupid body scan thing (which makes my heart race to the point that I get dizzy by the way... stupid airport security doesn't believe me).

Hopefully the flight nonsense used up all the stress for the entire trip.
Last night we went to Norwich. They have a mall called 'Castle Mall' that's right next to a cube of a castle, which the parking garage is directly beneath. I have pictures of all the crazy names they give their shops that made me giggle incessantly.
I had a Boost bar milk shake, my sister got a Ferraro rochette (rochere? those chocolate balls with the hazelnut inside) milk shake, and they tasted like awesome! But they were really thin in comparison to what I'm used to. Kind of like chocolate milk with sprinkles.

We've played a ton of games. Turns out my sister's fiance is just as much of a gamer as Jex and I are. The first night here we were all up till nearly 4 am playing ZOMBIES!!! The next night wasn't nearly as late as we played a game called Taliman, which is kind of a board game version of D&D without the role playing that makes people uncomfortable. Last night was Carcassonne, in which Rocker duped me into giving him 16 points because I didn't know how the game worked. The Punk.

Tonight we're going to Club Uber in downtown Norwich. I've never been clubbing. Didn't pack for clubbing. Didn't find anything I could actually wear in public (for less than 50 pounds) when we went shopping for club clothes yesterday. So I have a feeling I'll be the odd man out. In any case I'm bringing the camera because I can't pass up the opportunity for crazy pictures and possible black mail.

Happy Christmas everyone!!!!

Saturday, December 10, 2011

fitting room blues

Today I went Christmas shopping for some stocking stuffers. I'm going to print out some pages of cool stuff and have my family pick what they'd like for Present Day. I bring the stuffers because most people don't understand Present Day and get sad that I didn't give them anything on Christmas Day.

What is Present Day you ask? Present Day is the day after Christmas. Jex and I go shopping for/with one another while all the After Christmas shenannagans are going on and pick up stuff for half of what we would have got it for earlier in the year. What can I say; we're frugal.

Anyway, so the point. I like button up shirts. They're flattering on most every body type if they actually fit right. Which they NEVER do and like an idiot I still try them on every year come the holidays when they're out on all the racks look deceptively beautiful.
So here's my question: Who are they making mass produced clothes to fit?
Really, what body type/ BMI formula/ measurment combo are they going off of? Why is it that a size 5 juniors is too small for my big ass dainty butt but I can go and buy a girls 16 regular and it fits like a glove. WTF?!
I think that some one needs to tell me how to get a hold of big clothing companies so I can send them a mass printed letter.

The letter would go something like this:

Honorable CEO of [enter company name here],
I don't know if you've noticed but you're losing a lot of sales because many people can't fit into the clothes your robots sew together. If you have time I have a suggestion for button up shirts in particular. Perhaps this idea can be edited and used with a variety of your other products at a later time.
Make button up shirts that take into consideration cup size. Have S, M, and L shirts as normal but adjust for the varying chests that are trying to fit into them. Sm A would denote some one who's small and has a small chest where as Sm C would be one of those girls that despairs ever finding a shirt that will fit her figure.
I happen to own a sewing machine and know a few tricks to get stuff to fit me better, the majority of America does not follow this life style. Convienience makes money and it'd be really really convinient if I didn't have to edit everything I bought to fit my boobs.
Sincerely, Mrs. Ashes

Of course I'd look up more intellegent sounding vernacular. Probably bother Rachel over at her Chronicles to help me or something.

I was going to write about something else but now I can't remember. Probably something to do with the book store never having enough cashiers, ever. Oh wells.
Happy Christmas shopping to all and to all good deals.

Tuesday, December 6, 2011

Day 21... and you thought I forgot.

I'm on the home stretch of the 30 day challenge. Getting ready for England. AND feeling like crap. I haven't slept the passed couple night because my eyes have decided to go all photo sensitive on me. I live in an apartment complex that is so well lit I feel like I'm in that weird place in Norway where they have the sun shine for 24 hours in the summer. (Is that place even in Norway... or is it Alaska?) But whatever. I'm just going to pin a blanket over our window tonight or something.

So Day 21: Three Wishes

Sooo the wrong time of year for this.
Wish 1: Enough public transportation. This way it's okay to take away the licenses of all the IDIOTS, Red Necks in Huge Pickups, Punk 16 year olds not so great drivers. They can still get to work. There's an option for couples like me and Jex who are a one car household. Ha! didn't think we existed any more did ja?

Wish 2: That mornings sucked less by 50% do you know how much stuff I could get done if I could get over the hurdle that is Morning. I'd be flipping unstoppable!

Wish 3: That the FDA was actually intelligent and well funded enough to do what they were created to do.
What? You mean you're no longer keeping tabs on Genetically Modified Food?! Are you ASKING for the Apocalypse to pay us a visit? Did you know that a company in Cali makes corn that works as a sperm inhibitor?! Yay! End of the human race via Contraceptive CORN. CORN!!! That the largest crop on earth, one of the easiest plants to cross pollinate, the stuff that is in F*^%$$#%&*!!! everything. Leave the food alone. Mother Nature knows what the crap she's doing!
.... this is why I can't get into politics.... *sigh*

Thursday, December 1, 2011

I Spy~ UP!

I've jumped on a bandwagon of Awesome! Mostly because I'm a very visual person and I'd rather show a picture than talk about something.




I SPY!!! The super fun game of find, capture, and post that I play with Dazee and Christy. It's easy, simple, and totally fun. Get a camera, any camera, and take a peek at the prompt for this week. During the week snap photos that make you think of the prompt, be they crazy, psychodelically colorful, or thought provoking. When you're ready to post on Thursday snag the I Spy logo from Dazee, Christy, or me and link up with us. (I am still figuring out the link thing so you'll have to visit either of the awesome ladies mentioned above to do the linking.)
A picture is worth a thousand words; and all that. (^_^)


The prompt for this week was interesting.

UP.

I had a lot of fun trying different pictures and angles to get something that made me think of going UP or being UP and the like. But Jex and Kiyaba ended up taking the cake.



I heard my husband chanting "Up, Kiyaba, Up" turned around and witnessed our dog freaking out because she didn't want to jump onto the bench Jex was standing on. I whiped out my phone just in time to snap a picture of Kiyaba gathering enough courage to jump.

And now for my choice.



This is my hubby and Salthouse. They are THE SAME PERSON in almost every way. Look at their faces! AGH! But it works out because Salthouse's wife Druid and I are the same too. In any way that the boys are not the same they're the same as the other guy's girl and visa versa.
With our powers combined we create one whole married couple. Haha!

Next weeks Challenge is: Decorations and Your Choice.

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Home again home again... jiggidy jig...

I loved the crap out of Thanksgiving and the family and the fun. Oh the fun!
If it were ok for me to have Thanksgiving every month I would totally do it!

.... Then comes Christmas ....

You will see no joy from me over the upcoming ulcer indusing holiday of massproduction. I am a Scrooge with everything but the lights. I do really enjoy Christmas lights and driving down the housing developements with snacks and hot cocoa just gazing at the crazy compilations flung over every home.

But that's not what I'm talking about.
I'm HOME! My own house, my own pillow, my own kitchen. And the climb up to the 3rd floor.
I am however not jigging because I busted both my knees the night we got home (yesterday).

You see. Kiyaba, the 35lb puppy (DEAR GOD don't let her get any bigger!), was so excited to be home she had to stuff the entire appartment complex up her nose. Not kidding.
It was dark, wet cold, and I was tired from driving forever and a day back to Sandland from Texas and all I wanted her to do was pee so I could climb up the stairs and go to bed. I didn't have her on her leash because typically Kiyaba is really well behaved. But not that night. No. She just HAD to track down Wally, the chocolate lab she plays with sometimes and then FREAK OUT when I followed her. Stupid dog bolted.
Now I have lost a puppy before because it freaked out and bolted (hence why I love cats more, they've never once ran away from me). So my sleep deprived face flipped out a little and propelled me down the cement stairs at speeds unusual for a non-runner such as myself.
Leaning down I managed to get a hold of Kiyaba's scruff and trip on the last step at the same time. Oh yes. There was a flurry of fur and blue stripes as we skid and rolled on the side walk. And wouldn't you know it the majority of the impact was on my knees.
With fewer curses than I felt like shouting I picked up the biggest puppy on earth and limped back to our appartment building and up the stairs and proptly shut her in the laudry room before getting ice.
I decided against a picture because it might gross some people out. However if they bruise really prettily I'm definately putting one up.
Isn't it grand to be home? *grumble mumble sigh*

Thursday, November 24, 2011

I spy: Thankful

I've been meaning to jump on the ISpy bandwagon with Dazee and Christy for a while. [insert excuses/life events that got in my way here]

Today's prompt... because technically it is still Thursday... Is Thankful.


The Extendo-family
You know, the family you actually get to choose as you run around the curves life throws at you.
I'm so very thankful to have them in my life. They make it so much shinier.


Paper Telephone
I don't know if you can read it, but it's hilarious.
It's like telephone but with paper, everyone's lack of art skill, and quirkiness.
One of the best games ever.



My Choice
This is an older picture, however, I never get tired of looking at it or sharing it.
Check out the monkey.


He's totally giving that little girl the stink eye.

Wednesday, November 23, 2011

Tay-has or Bust

You know your cappaccino doesn't have enough caffeine in it when you look in your rear view to see a Semi barrelling down on your bumper and the only thought that comes to you is: "Oooh! Optimus Prime!"

((For those of you who don't know, Semi Trucks scare me. Not just I get a little on edge when I drive around them. No. This fear is on the edge of Panic Attack Land. And since I obviously can't fight the big bellowing monster spewing black into the air and roaring as it barrels down the road in Rinky the dinky red station wagon I tend to turn into speed racer... or make pitiful noises that sound suspiciously like wimpers. ))

So, Jex and I drove the 22 hours to Texas for Thanksgiving with some of the coolest people in our lives. I can't remember if I gave them code names or not. Hmmmm.... Anynames we started driving on the first hour of Yesterday, the 22nd, and began the long trip on a mostly empty road with a cooler full of goodies and several audio books. It started out well. We listened to Harry Dresden ((It's like Harry Potter but actually awesome)) take on all mannor of creepyness (because I am a nerd like that) and took turns sleeping in the passenger seat. The dog only puked once. It was going really well.
Then the battery light lit up.
We've had an alternater in our trunk for a few weeks now. We knew our alternater was going bad. I even took the time to change our spark plugs (and holy crap did they need changing... one of them was bent people! bent!) and install a new air filter. Yet somehow it was a good idea to take the alternater and speakers out of the trunk before starting our trek of grand proportions.
At first the battery light only lit up if I went over 75. It flickered like there was a loose wire or something. Then it began lighting up if we went over 60. And then it didn't turn off.
We pulled over to get some breakfast and I lost the dash. All the lights died, the gages stopped working and there was a beeping sound I've never heard before.
The alternater died exactly halfway to our destination. EXACTLY!
We were back on the road 5 hours, 3 wrong alternaters, and 400 dollars later we were back on the road. So much for the money we got back from our move. But at least we're not in the hole. So that's nice.

We're here now. In one piece and loving on our friends. And I can't wait to get video of the lot of us getting drunk and trying to play Curses.

Happy Thanksgiving. May you're list of Thanks be longer than your list of Disappointments this year!

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

NaNoWriMo Project Excerpt #2

Have I told you guys that I LUV battle sequences but my characters often just talk all the time? Yeah, my characters are punks like that.


Tokaresh'Ket Excerpt: First real battle.

“What does it feel like?” Tokaresh asked. “I see nothing in the trees.”

“They have to be there. That's where I feel them. Savala-rheva taught me how to do this till I could pick out a halfling in a sea of people.” Richette huffed. “This doesn't make sense.”

The first scream rang out before either of them saw it.

“Makes sense now.” Tokaresh growled dangerously.

Below them several metal maws burst from the rings into the basin that was Thromnblad and out of those maws poured orcs and goblins en masse with a few riding beasts that hadn't been seen for several Drugen generations, Wyvern.

“What the hell?!” Richette cried, it took all her self control to remember not to slam her fist down on something. “What the bleeding rings of hell?!”

“With Wyvern here we'll have to separate. Where should I drop you?” Tokaresh asked quickly.

Richette scanned the ant hill effect below them for a moment. “On that guy, the one with the long purple plume in his helm.”

Richette felt the click more than heard is as she disengaged from the clips on the saddle. With a kind of grace and oneness that could only come from connected souls the golden dragon tucked his wings and rolled through the air sending the slight woman up and over his spiraling form. Richette fell like a stone her hands and arms spread wide palms out and fingers up. Air tore at her clothes, her eyes, her hair, and stole the breath straight out of her lungs. Slowly Richette brought her gloved hands down parallel with the quickly rising ground. Closing her gold brown eyes she sunk her arms and legs deep into the flow beyond in the space between. The Winding Works slowed her fall enough, just enough. Her eyes snapped open as she righted herself and braced. With a mighty crash and the crunch of breaking bone and compacting metal the Woman in fur lined, gold plated, armor crashed onto the orc like a comet. Displaced air rippled like an aftershock and blood sprayed in an impressive arc. There was a silent moment where all within sight of the oozing mas of meat and bone that lay in an amorphous bloody pile paused in sheer confusion.

A figure stood out of the gore with a wicked grin. With deliberate speed the woman unhooked the winged helm from her side and pulled it snug over her head. “Oi.” She called drawing a wickedly curved khopesh and fingering the hilt of another, smaller, curved blade at her hip. “You're trespassing.” She said with a growl.

There was an angry roar directed at her by the large, muscular, orc soldiers. They're smooshed snouts and protruding tusks that rose from their over large lower jaws retracted into vicious snarls. The goblins, rounder and softer with large Faern-like ears, shied away in contrast. Richette roared impressively in return.

There was a surge among the green and muck colored warriors. They're hide armor looked stitched together haphazardly from the skins of too many different creatures in a kind of 'one size fits all' pattern. Some of the more hulking brutes burst the seams as they raised their nasty looking clubs to strike. The smaller, though still twice the musculature of any human man, orcs seemed impeded by the stiff hides that practically swam on their bodies.

Richette closed her eyes for a moment and took a deep breath. The first one to the top of the steaming, still warm, corpse hill was overlarge and smelled of rotten milk and smoke. Richette pulled the smaller curved blade from her hip and brought its full weight against the mighty side swipe she ducked beneath. The perfectly forged kukri sliced through the sinew between sturdy orc bone like a hot knife through butter. In one fluid movement she Khopesh stabbed into the firm flesh beneath her slick leather boots and took hold of the disembodied arm so that her right hand could continue the momentum the orc behemoth had started. The heavy spiked club swung through the air with all the grace of a falling tree. The first two skulls barely slowed it down the third orc tried to move out of the way and toppled over the comrades behind him causing a domino effect that was surprisingly fatal as improperly carried weapons skewered several of those that had lost their footing. A few even fell on their own weapons. The Club found its resting place in the side of another of the larger creatures. Spikes slid between the lacing on the side of his armor. With a red cough and a final flailing growl the monster went down in a fury of movement that knocked several of his fellows back.

Retrieving her sword Richette grimaced. Her surprise had cut a deep gash, but not deep enough for her to hold out on her own. Judging by what she had seen in the air and what she felt in the Works they were going to need a little luck and a lot of help from the Maker, otherwise they were screwed.

Something bounced off her breastplate and into the orc on her left. An arrow fletched with crow feathers pointed at her from the eye in the orc's deep set socket.

Richette sucked in a steadying breath. If the archers were on a higher road then she was dead, it was only a matter of time. With a grunt she lowered her center of gravity and bull rushed straight ahead before any more of the slime colored brutes could swarm up the sides of the rapidly cooling Wyvern corpse.

She lost her sword in the tumble but managed to keep hold of her kukri. Bodies flailed, those that were upright tripped and stampeded over their comrades in a mad dash to get to the rider before she could get the advantage again. Gold brown eyes looked around as she tumbled down the side of the Wyvern in a snowball made of screaming and flailing bodies. Time slowed the way it always does when one is seconds away from agony. Richette was able to stare into the gaping maw of the steel snake that had chewed through the earth into the inverted walls of Thromnblad. To her horror it was a never ending stream of steel and gnashing teeth. These weren't average Marauders, but they were too disorganized for an army of any sort. What was going on?

Time returned to normal and Richette tumbled around and bounced off the firm musculature of the warriors she had knocked over. Several weapons were already bearing down on her prone form regardless of those around her. For a moment Richette felt disconnected from her body. She watched as her hand reached for the broken Magery stuffed into her belt and aim straight ahead at the soldier vomiting maw of the snake. Her index finger brought down the lever Richette had yet to figure out as her other hand reached out, dipped into the Winding Works, and grabbed hold. The gears moved, there was a spark, a flash of light, and a roaring explosion that knocked Richette backwards so forcefully she felt more of the dead Wyvern's bones break along with a couple of her own when she was slammed against it.

There was a terrible moment of silence. Slowly the sound of moaning and shrieking. Richette tried to blink the darkness from her eyes. Everything was bleary, as if she'd just woken up to stare straight into the sun. “Tokaresh!” She cried out fearing that any moment could turn her into a striking rendition of a pin cushion.

A blob of gold filled her vision for a second before she was swept up into the sky surrounded by careful talons. “What did you do?!” Tokaresh's voice echoed through her head.

“I used the Magery Savala-rehva gave me.” Richette gasped as her body struggled to replace the breath forcefully expelled from it. “Maker's hammer! I used that broken Magery!”

“Well, it worked.” Tokaresh said carefully. “It seems Ge'linn and the others are harrying the retreat.

“Retreat? But the battle just begun.” Richette said warily her vision was returning slowly but it was still swimming.

“Avoee... You destroyed two of their metal monsters and left a mark that I'm sure may be impossible to erase.” Tokaresh said hesitantly.

Richette felt a wave of fear leaden her limbs and burn her chest like an ice brand. “I killed a lot of Drugen didn't I?”

There was a moment of silence. “We shall see.”

Tokaresh landed on his hind legs and carefully set his Anaweem on her feet. She swayed slightly before regaining her footing and walking forward. She turned away from the homes they shared and looked out over Thromnblad. The gold dragon hadn't exaggerated. There was a huge chunk tore into the eastern side of the basin of a town. The perfect aerial target would now forever be lopsided.
A black gaze and a brown gold stare locked onto the unassuming bit of wood and metal the woman's hand still clutched. Who had made something like this and what could they possibly have needed it for?Neither dragon nor rider said anything as they waited for their comrades.


Day 20 and a little emotional gushage

Lets start with day 20 of the 30 day challenge! Wooo! only 10 more days to go!
Then I'll tell you all about my NaNoWriMo awesomage and then we may or may not delve into the emotional explosion that has been the last couple of days.

Day 20 is: Nicknames that you have and why/how you got them.
Bwuahahahahaha. I like this one.

Pumpkin: Not only was I born on Halloween under a full moon, but I was also a bit jaundiced. So I was literally orange when I was born. My mom was not happy with this declaration from my dad.

Sweet Cheeks: Given to me by my father shortly after birth, I can't remember why.

Ashes: I don't know who gave this to me first. Maybe it was my Aunt, or my Unkle Tom (I really think it was Unkle Tom because nicknames are kind of his thing). But it's what I was called by my family for FOREVER! Oddly enough all the meanings I've found around it resonate so well with my actual persona I thought about legally changing my name to Ashes.

Rinoah: Ah, middle school. So I had a crush for this kid, Justin I think his name was, and I was totally freaking IN LOVE with Final Fantasy 8. So when this fun blue eyed boy comes up and says: "Hey you remind me of Rinoah Heartilly can I call you Rinoah?" I was like: "YES!" I honestly didn't know I had a thing for him till we had a fight and he stopped writing me. It wasn't my fault his hand wrighting was so atrocious one of his letters never made it to me. Punk.

Haiki: Ah, middle school again. I translated my name into Japanese when I was like 12, same for the homeschooled girls down the street from me. We called each other by these terrible names for a while.

Redd: My maiden name. Because by the age of 14 I didn't really respond to my given name unless one of my family members was saying it.

Radish: Jex's fault... I tried to go just by Ash for a while. Before I got so angry with the 'pokemon' references I met Jex. He asked my last name as he was jumping from cement barrier to cement barrier. I answered and he goes: "Ash Redd. Redd Ash." His lightning struck blue eyes widened and he smiled in a way that I would forever remember as a smile to be avoided at all costs and said. "RADISH!" Nooooooooooo! I am not a vegetable! No! Why God, why?! *ahem*

Rem: This is the one that stuck. In highschool easily 25% of the students shared my name and another 15% shared a friend of mine's name, Mel. )And apparently it's not Kosher to ignore the popular girl who announces that since her nick name is 'red' I can't use my actual last name as what I go by.) Our super cool third member of the "Trio of Terror" Kai offered the solution of picking out Japanese names for each other that fit our personalities. Sweet! I was super in love with Jett Li and the movie Hero at the time so I was like "OMG! I'm going to be No Name!" Nanashi, turned out to be the Japanese translation. Yay! Mel ended up being the absolute pickiest person on the planet. "No the Kanji is stupid, too hard, too simple. The name doesn't mean something cool enough, too masculine, too feminine, too whatever." So in the end Kai and I were like: "FINE! You don't get a name! You're Nanashi!" Then I was like: "Wait... now what's my name?" [insert facepalm here]
So, my friends assured me that they'd find a good name for me and rejected every idea I came up with for a few days. I gave up and just let them brew. If I got a name then I got a name if not then I guess I could try to beat the 'pokemon' reference out of Ash. Maybe replace it with an Evil Dead reference.
One day Nana and Kai came careening off the bus and to the corner where we met before classes and announced with blinding white glee that they had found my name. THE PERFECT NAME for me. "Rem" They said together.
I wasn't sure. "Rem? That's not a Japanese name."
But it didn't matter because they said they were my friends and that is what they were going to call me. FOREVER. And they have. Now so do my parents, my husband, my other friends, just about everyone who has met me in person.
It's so much so my name at this point that early on in our marriage when Jex said my given name I got mad at him and nearly demanded who the hell "Ash*****" was. Then realized it was me. *furious blush*
Just in case you're wondering "Rem" is a Japanese name that is usually translated as "Ren" but both spellings are acceptable since the n and m sound are pretty much the same in Japanese. It's a boys name that means "Lotus". It'd be nice if that's the reason why they picked the name, for all the meanings behind the Lotus flower... no... it was a character in a comic series they were reading called TriGun, who apparently is my personality clone. *shrugs*


NANOWRIMO!!!! = Awesomage!!!!
I'm up to 25K words! Go me! And in celebration I think I'll post a little excerpt again. It'll be shorter than the first one.

And I think I'm just going to ignore my emotional instability for now. I'm running out of precious internet time.

Tuesday, November 15, 2011

Day 19 Didn't they already ask this question?

Sooooooo, I'm still plugging away at the 30 day Challenge. Today is day 19 because I miraculously restarted at the right number. This is what Jex calls one of my patented 'perfect mistakes'. Why? Because if I actually put all my effort into something it becomes volatile and explody, if I don't care or don't have enough time to actually try whatever I'm doing turns out Cramazingly! Yay me?

I digress, today is day 19 and the 30 day committee asks for me to list Plans, Dreams, and Goals that I have.
Didn't they ask me this already?! like on the second or third day?! BAH! HURRUMPH! and all those other sputtering sounds of indignation. I'm no good with these things. I live by the hour and maybe dip my toes in the water of tomorrow and next week from time to time. Meh.

Plans: I plan on getting a job at some point.
Finishing the dress project I want to do even if it's by hand.
Making my mom and my sister's christmas presents (ha! we'll see how that turns out).
I also plan on losing the extra 15 pounds I put on in order to to raise the chances of getting pregnant. It didn't work so it's got to go.

Dreams: Actually I had a really weird dream night before last. Jex and I were on our dream vacation to Ireland. We found a little known historical site and decided to join one of the tours. It was a rocked house with a thatched roof that was almost one room. The windows were open and let light stream in those awesome looking rays. One window was called the Spider window, there had always been a large spider that made her home there until the last few years. Beside that window on a pedestal was a carved stone that was in the shape of a narrow pyramid. A 'do not touch' sign was hung around it. The celtic carvings were worn down, I supposed from people touching the stone so much for good luck. Then I noticed it wasn't so much wear, though there was a lot of that, but dirt that had filled all the carved lines and curves. When I pointed it out to the director she was flabbergasted. I offered to clean it for free since none of the workers wanted to touch the stone. Apparently it wasn't the kind of luck they particularly wanted.
Jex had picked up a tiny little harp and decided to play it for me while I cleaned the stone. I can still remember the tune. And while he played a really pretty garden spider (you know, the black and yellow ones) began weaving a web in the once abandoned 'spider window'. It reminded me of a mix of ballet and cirque du soleil (I think I spelled that right) as the spider jumped and weaved in the rays that the sun streamed through the window.
Usually when I dream of spiders I'm avoiding them or running from giant versions of them or trying to keep my little brother from dying because he got bit by a radioactive one (nope no superpowers for the radioactive things in my dreamworld... just death) so the peaceful feeling with the dream was really unexpected.

Goals: Well... there's a basket ball goal down the street. A soccer goal by the baptist church next door, aaaannnnnd... hehehe. Just kidding.
I guess my goal is to be less hard on myself. I don't know if I've ever talked about this here but I'm actually a really negative person when it comes to myself. For some reason God only knows I don't give myself any room for being human. I either pass or fail and more often than not it's fail.
But then if things go really well and I'm really happy for more than a few days I flip out and have a panic attack before falling into what Jex calls my 'pit'. Sometimes I'm afraid I'll have to start taking meds because EVERY WOMAN IN MY FAMILY is on them for either depression or anxiety. And I refuse. I hate medication. I'll drink a special tea every morning or eat more soy or fish (eeeewwwww) but I'm not swallowing a pill. Nope. Nuh uh. Not happening.
So.... Be less hard on myself/skitzo. And figure out what the difference between a Plan and a Goal is. Because to me they're pretty much the same thing.

Sunday, November 13, 2011

BUWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! *cough*

*insert corny lighting bolts and fan effects*

*ahem* My husband is back! The Military finally decided that it's ok for him to be less than 1000 miles away from me! I'm so happy! Even though he decimated my clean house in less than 12 hours.

And our car is dying. According to Assbreaker Tony it's about time for it to die. He actually only intended for Rinky the dinky red car to get us around for a year or so. Just long enough for us to get settled in the U.S. and buy our own vehicle. The poor thing has gotten us over Rabbit Ears pass in Colorado twice, from Georgia to Washington state and back, to Texas four times, and Mississippi, up to Massechusettes and back this passed month, not to mention the bajillion trips back and forth from Georgia to South Carolina we had to take while waiting for Jex's classes to FINALLY start. Poor little car.
I want a Passat or a Prius. Jex is thinking a Suberu monster Baja

I don't even remember what day of my 30 day challenge I'm on... I think the last one was 17? Sure that sounds close to right. So today I'll do 18.

30 day challenge #18: Some one you would want to switch lives with and why.

Hmmmmmmmmm.... Does this person have to be alive now?
Well if the person doesn't have to be alive now I'd have to say Noah. Why? Because I really want to see what the world was like a few thousand years ago. I really really do. I don't want to hear theories; which to me is the scientific word for 'imagination'. I want to see it with my Face! Then come right back home. Unless the theories about older civilizations being more advanced than we are now is true. Then I want to stay for a few weeks or so before coming back home and writing a award winning book that will replace twilight.

If it has to be a person who is still alive then.... uhhhh.... Now I wonder if it'd be wierd to pick a different gender.... bleh who cares.
Keith Urban's personal assistant. Why? Because I'm curious about which actors are actually cool people and who are actually douches. Especially since meeting members of my favorite band.
Maybe I could go fishing with Morgan Freeman or something. *Ha! I laugh at myself*

Saturday, November 5, 2011

Day 17 and a Novelist's update

And so I find that I'm doing too many things at once, yet again.

Anyway today's number on the 30 day challenge is actually fairly easy to accomplish.
Day 17 is: Something you could live without.

Oh boy! Here Marrianna Annadanna and V will get one of those lists they love so. Because I feel like ranting just a little bit.

All the things Ashes could live without.
1. Daylight Savings
2. The massive amount of country radio stations
3. Bad Rap music (there is actually some good rap music out there. It's not just a myth!)
4. Gangster Style
5. Brand names
6. Fan Girls
7. Fan Girls
8. Twilight Fan Girls (I'm talking the crazy ones, if you're a sane Twilight fan I hold nothing against you. Honestly I enjoyed much of the books myself.)
9. Inuyasha Fan Girls
10. Stupid drivers
11. Cell phones
12. the Flu Shot
13. World of Warcraft (actually any MMOG, Massive Multiplayer Online Game)
14. Wal-Mart
15. 1/2 my wardrobe
16. Cosmetics
17. Dymatap (or any other godawful substance that is 'supposed' to be good for you)
18. Plastic women (the ones that are alive just for clarification)
19. Jersey Shore
20. It's always sunny in Philadelphia
21. Most reality tv in general
22. Music television that doesn't play music.
23. The 52million and 4 infomercial channels in cable packages.
24. Religious people (not you spiritual people who actually live what you believe)
25. That guy who leaves the cart in the best parking space.
26. Processed Cheese Products
27. Pabst Blue Ribbon (eeeeeeewwwwwwwwwww! Who actually likes this stuff?!)

I feel better.

I've gotten nearly 7,000 words down in 3 days. I felt good about that till I saw that the majority of my friends had gotten to the 15-18,000 mark, that effectively popped my pride balloon. Thanks to Shane for making me feel better by saying that mine was probably better quality. Probably a lie, but it made me feel good.

I don't know if the excerpt I posted was too long. I'm thinking of posting shorter segments from time to time and seeing what you all think since you're who it's there for. So, would more bite sized pieces of my NaNoWriMo project be better for you guys? I would like to hear from my silent readers on this one too. Again this is all for you guys.

Thursday, November 3, 2011

NaNoWriMo Project Excerpt #1

To all you random internet peoples who are fishing for good stuff. This story is MINE. Steal it from me and experience for yourself that the phrase 'hell hath no fury to that of a woman...' to be a complete and utter truth.

Here's the beginning of my NaNoWriMo Project I randomly titled 'Tokaresh'ket' (I made up a language for the dragons... because I'm a NERD. Torkaresh'ket means 'strongest' or 'too strong')

Swords swung in her hands. Deftly, deadly, and full of the grace that comes with years of practice with a blade. Only the Faern and the Drugen could boast such skills because of their long lifespans, and the Anaweem; dragon riders. The blades swung in arcs and slashes as she switched hands and flipped one end over end in order to turn and make a mighty cross body slash. At the end of the harsh movement the sword clattered noisily to the stones that paved the training grounds atop the Guardian Pillar. A slender hand went to the feminine breast plate painted gold with a copper slash from shoulder to the tip of the ribcage on the other side. With a clang and a crunching sound the woman fell to her knees and looked to the sky. She couldn't breathe. Off flew the helm. The winged gold plated shape toppled through the air like a lamed bird before bouncing off the stones and careening into a weapon rack. Golden rimmed brown eyes looked unseeingly into the sky as she forced her breathing to become even once again. “I can't believe I'm here.” The voice was quiet, hoarse, and tight. Memories assailed her and she crashed to the unforgiving stones, golden red hair spilling around her armor like blood.

3 years ago....

The night was cool and calm. Even the sweet night lilies were unusually fragrant. It had been a long and happy festival day and many of the town's inhabitants were now sleeping like the dead. Soft moonlight from an unusually bright crescent cascaded into one of the many thatch roof houses. This house was different from the others, yet matched the two that flanked it. All were simple dwellings attached to barns that were too large and made of stone. These were the dragons and their riders, sent by the Kersh themselves to protect it.

A woman lay tangled in the moonlight that cascaded into the Rider's house. The man beside her holding tight to her arm. She may have been the only one awake in the entire village at that moment. She looked at the man with a gentle gaze before slipping her free hand into his messy brown hair. He mumbled something in his sleep at the touch. “Richette.” She couldn't help but smile. Her well balanced lips turning up ever so slightly at the corners. “Talon.” She whispered back. It had been a long day for her man and his golden dragon, Tokaresh. They had flown without stop, doing daring feats with the others and taking to their task of keeping watch. Not that the days were dangerous, but marauder parties had been increasing in tenacity as of late. She remembered them well and a hand touched her side where the memory would forever be.
“You should be asleep.” Tokaresh's purring voice said to her in the silence of the night.
With a deep sigh Richette twisted a lock of soft brown hair between her fingers. “I know. My mind is as full as the Winding Works. I should tell Talon.”
“Only three more days and you can tell him the way you'd planned.” The dragon chuckled. When there was no response other than the tight high pitched hum of the woman's sudden emotion he stopped. “What is it avoee?” It was a title he had made up for her since her position was very unusual. Dragons and their titles about as inseparable as lovers and their kisses.
“If, if he... what if he gets angry?” Richette bit her lip as old fears welled up into her eyes making them feel like they were going to pop out of her head.
Tokaresh purred in the space between, the Winding Works, the place Richette had always been able to touch but not use. “All will be well.”
“I have a bad feeling Toki.” The dragon cringed at the old name but knew she hadn't meant to revert to it. The woman was upset, she was afraid, he understood why. “A really really bad feeling.”
Before he could respond his wingman, Lokai, was in the Works. “I smell something.”
“What?” Both Tokaresh and the human woman asked at the same time.
Lokai sucked in a deep breath. “Brimstone.”

Richette sat up like one struck with a lightning bolt. “Talon!” She cried shaking him awake. “Talon! Black dragons are here! Talon wake up!” She jumped out of bed and flung open the chest at the foot of it.
Talon was up and bleary eyed. He made to run out the door in nothing but his skivvies. His wiry frame was lined with cut, efficient, muscle. Richette couldn't help but give it an appreciative glance before taking hold of his arm. “Wait, wait. Armor.”
Blue eyes struck with veins of lightning and flecks of sapphire cleared as they met her light brown eyes. “Yes, I knew that.” Talon said with a lopsided grin that set Richette's heart aflutter every time.
In minutes they had him dressed in his heavy studded leather rider's armor and ran to saddle Tokaresh. By the time the gold dragon and the blue eyed warrior were ready to go the first blossoming orange flame was on the horizon. Probably one of the grain silos at the edge of the farmland.
Talon took her hand in his and kissed it before drawing her into a tender kiss. “Get the women and children to the Hope Stone.”
“I will. Come back to me.” Richette never wanted to let go of Talon's strong hand.
He smiled and kissed her again. “Always.” Talon jumped into the impressive height of the simple leather and chain saddle with all the grace and power of a mountain cat. “You too, Tokaresh.”
The golden dragon chuckled before beating his wings in a mighty gust that knocked Richette on her butt. The other dragons and their riders were just coming out with their riders as Richette picked herself up off the ground. She waved to them before taking off into the center of town.

There was an old church in the center of town. The bell tower stood like a spike to send prayers piercing into the heavens where the Maker lived with his hoard of other worldly warriors and seers. She ran, ignoring the fact that she was still in her night dress, and slammed into the side door of the church with all the force she could muster. “Vicor! Vicor Romley!” She cried as she tried to force her way into the white marble building that was so incongruous with the little thatch, wood, and stone buildings surrounding. “Ring the bell! Void dragons are coming!”
There was no response, not a stir nor a whisper. Then the sound of window panes opening behind and above her. She turned to see the round face of the smith looking down at her. “Richette, have the dragons gone?”
Richette turned her body to face the smithy. “Thank the Maker. Calus, I was called to get the women and children to the Hope Stone.”
Calus nodded and closed his window. Within minutes he, his wife May, and their sons were out of the smithy and on the street. “We'll split up. You get the Hope Stone ready.”
With a nod Richette took off towards the cliff the village was built against. There were four Hope Stones, one in each cardinal direction. The one against the cliff face had always been thought as the most reliable. Usually an invading army couldn't get archers on the cliff and if they did the tangle of wood and brush that was purposefully left around the cliff would keep the arrows from striking true. It's where Richette assumed the majority of the villagers would run. From there she'd go around the village and activate the other stones on her way. Just in case the heavy feeling in her chest was right.

Branches scratched and tore at Richettes white night dress as she pushed her way through the thicket to the pair of stones that stood beside the other like sentries. They were covered in runes that stayed clear and newly carved even as the stone was worn by time. Richette touched the right stone and closed her eyes. Touching the space between, the space where magic and thoughts moved in a torrent like an underground river, she brought the runes life. The hum and glow of magic successfully cast met her ears and her warm brown eyes when they opened.
“So this is where they kept the other Hope Stone.” A deep rich voice purred from behind Richette.
Slowly she turned to face the one who had spoken to her. He was tall, tall as a half Faen, but dark in every way. Except his eyes. His eyes were completely white, save a black slash down the center that reminded Richette of Lokai and Tokaresh. “No.” She whispered as she backed violently into the Hope Stone. “No, you can't be real!”
“I assure you, lady. I am very real.” The cascading black shadow that was his hair swished like individual threads of silk as he rushed towards her.
Richette wanted to move but couldn't. Her legs were rooted into place as if they'd become one with the stone beneath her bare feet.
He stopped inches from her face. Those unsettling eyes ever on her own. Was he trying to see int her soul? Could he really suck the soul out of her face if he found the deepest part of it? “You're wise to fear me, lady.” He purred in a mocking rendition of Tokaresh's comforting tone. “Move away from the stone and you might live through this.”
Richette shook her head. “No.”
“You're no virgin, you don't have the necessary purity to keep me from my goals. I will go through you if I must. You know this. You listened to the dragons too well not to. Though it'd be such a waste to have to rend your lovely form.” He ended his threat with an appraising gaze that made Richettes throat go cold. The feeling cascaded into the pit of her stomach and clenched painfully at the sound of the approaching villagers.
Heavy, cold, afraid, Richette's emotions buckled the stone her legs had become and slid her down to the base of the Hope Stone. Her hands splayed out beside her over smooth rock that had been washed from the cliff face years ago. She bowed her head and felt the sting of fresh tears prick her eyes before rolling over her cheeks.
Laughter rung above her causing her to look up. The abominable creature held up a hand ready to click his fingers. It was a favorite motion to mages who played with fire. 'I'm sorry Talon.' Richette thought with resignation as she clenched her fists around the sharpest rock she could find. With as much speed as she could muster the small woman flung into the false man in front of her bringing the rock up into his elbow. If she remembered right then this would give the villagers some time, if she remembered right. For an instant she felt her hope drain from her and leave her limbs cold as she looked into the enraged eyes of the monster in man form. Then the satisfying crunch of breaking bone reverberated through the rock and into her fingers. “Click your fingers now.” Her mouth taunted as she dropped the rock and sped away from him.
A roar followed her, a roar of rage, a dragon's roar somehow distorted and strange. He was seeing red, he was seeing only her, and that was what made her wonder why she'd thought the plan was such a good idea only moments ago.

Richette's night dress was in tatters by the time she broke through the overgrown wood with a scream. Blood trickled from the deeper scrapes down her arms, legs, and face. She felt the stinging only a moment before adrenaline wiped it from her mind. Another roar and an explosion behind her reminded her to keep running. Richette's bare feet found every sharp object and broken bit of stone as they propelled her between buildings and out of the flow of spells that sent torrents of acid through alley ways like water through a canal, flames rushing like the breath of a great red, or peals of sound that knocked everything forward into heaps of wreckage. The Winding Works kept Richette from bearing the brunt of the attacks made in blind fury. But she was not entirely unscathed. Her left arm was bleeding from where acid droplets had splashed and eaten away her skin. Pulses from her heart beat could be felt along the outside of her right elbow from the burn that bubbled her skin. And her feet could no longer be ignored even with the force of adrenaline coursing through her veins. She knew then that she was going to die.

The sound of wings buffeted through the pain and sent Richette down an alley that lead to the fields. Maybe if she could get the man shaped manifestation behind her into the open Tokaresh and Lokai could deal with it. The tall grass, even the thorned weeds that hid therein, was soft to her battered feet as she ran into the open field. The sun was on the horizon, greyish with a tinge of orange, it gave her hope. The old stories said that he couldn't be out in direct sunlight and she could see no clouds. With renewed vigor Richette sprinted onto the rocky hill that separated the cucumbers and the squash. Suddenly he was in front of her. White eyes aflame with a hatred she couldn't have imagined. Shock halted her steps and jolted her to the ground.
She heard her name from far away.
A flash.
Something gold crashed beside her and cried out.
Nothing could tear her gaze from those horrific eyes. That pure unadulterated emotion that promised her pain in ways she'd never considered before. A sword came down and tore his eyes from her to the new comer.
The young man wailed on the creature shaped as man with the kind of strength and purpose borne from chivalry. Talon beat it back to the edge of the rocky hill. The sky was more gray than black now. Pink tinged the horizon behind where the woman and the wounded dragon looked on at the one sided battle. White eyes looked to Richette and the slitted pupils narrowed dangerously. “I tire of this avakka.”
Tokaresh growled indignantly.
The dark man's hand turned to a blade made of shining black dragon scales, clear as crystal, deep as ink. The blade easily parried Talon's and slashed.
“NO!” Richette screamed and ran forward. Her eyes wide in horror even with the burning light of a new day directed into them. She held out her hands and caught the top half of Talon with a choking scream. She didn't hear the mocking farewell she didn't notice the blood that was quickly pooling in her lap or the fact that the part of Talon she clung to was missing an arm and the lower half of his body.

“Shay, I love you.” Talon gurgled through blood that leaked from his mouth. “Take care of Tokaresh.”
“I will.” Richette promised. “I will.” She bent her head and kissed him. “I love you.”
The tingle of magic touched her lips even as Talon's rent form settled more heavily against her. Pain blossomed in her chest and she heard Tokaresh's roar of agony from behind her. The soul bond had been torn and reassigned to save the dragon from his rider's fate. The pain was too much, all of it. She couldn't cry, she couldn't scream, she couldn't see anything but Talon's peaceful, empty, face. Richette laid her head on the good part of Talon's cooling chest, closed her eyes, and let the darkness take her away.

Tokaresh pushed himself upright and tucked the broken wing gingerly to his side and winced at the tear in his chest. Black eyes looked over the split form of his anaweem and the woman who had loved him as she lay clutched to his neck. The monster had left with dawns first true rays of light. He hoped it had thought both he and the woman dead from the amount of damage they had taken from the Soul Tare.
Lokai landed beside him and shook out his shimmering white scales. “Tokaresh! What did this to you?” His ice blue eyes looked to where his wingman's eyes were glued. “Shk'zk!” The drake cursed in his native tongue. His rider, a woman in her mid thirties slid out of the saddle and walked slowly forward. “Oh Lokai. What do we do?” Tears stung her bright green eyes as she knelt over Richette. Her brown braid's tassel caressed the young woman's face as she leaned forward to check her pulse.
Lokai looked Tokaresh over for a moment before letting out a sigh. “We take them to the Guardian Tower and come back for the body...”
“Talon.” Tokaresh interrupted so firmly the name was nearly a barked growl.
“Talon.” Lokai amended softly. “We'll send some one back for Talon.”
With a numb nod Lokai's rider began to gently peel Richette from to the top half of Talon. A sob broke through her own lips when the unconscious woman clutched to the body tighter. “Come Richette.” She said in a watery whisper. “It's only me, Adelaide.” She started to pry her off again. “We need to get you to the healer.”
Richette hummed something unintelligible but relented her grasp on Talon's neck.
Adelaide held Richette close and turned to Lokai. The dragon turned from his Anaweem to his wingman. “Can you get to the Hope Stone?”
Tokaresh nodded his head slightly. “I wasn't named thus for nothing.”
With a sad smile Adelaide lead the way through the smoking heap that was the southern half of the wood. They passed through the light of the Hope Stone and appeared in the huge open hall of the Guardian Tower.

Richette woke with a start crying out for her love, her heart. There was a moment of fog which was quickly chased away by the icy clarity of Tokaresh's wounded form. Tears burned warm brown eyes that now held a ring of harvest gold blurring vision. “Oh.” The sound was quiet, small, and seemed to come from far away. One hand came up to her chest and pressed. Pain shot through her body like lightning and blood welled between her fingers. “Aahhh.” The sound was small and strangled. It lead to a sob that wasn't borne simply from the pain of the body. “Tokaresh, will you be alright?” The words eeked out of her tight throat like a goblin through a drain pipe.
“Yes, avoee. My Anaweem, I'll be alright.” His voice wavered but it was clear. “Will you be alright?”
Richette felt her stomach and tentatively touched the Winding Works to see what others could not. The light that had been flickering brightly had vanished. It was gone along with the one who'd lit it. Her eyes glazed over and tears fell like rain. “I don't know.” Then she felt herself sob so hard it should have been a scream.

Richette vaguely remembered the proceeding weeks. Adelaide had told her that her collar bone and ribs had been shorn through but her guts were fine. It was the same for Tokaresh and that they'd be aided in their healing by the white robes; riders who had lost their dragons and somehow survived. They lived long and had gifts for healing. It was one of the many interesting ways the Maker moved through the world, Talon had said.
Talon.
He's gone.

Richette didn't know how many days had passed before she and Tokaresh were allowed to move. Her legs felt like jello and her soul felt numb and almost as if it were missing chunks. She was ever aware of Tokaresh and wondered if it were the same for him. If a wave of sadness hit her and she began to cry he would apologize and tuck his head beneath his good wing. It was a comforting thing, odd, new, unwelcome to be sure, but somehow comforting. Her misery had intimate company.

More days passed beyond grasp or real comprehension before Tokaresh and Richette were summoned to see the Kersh. Gold brown eyes met the deep black of the dragon. “It's rude to keep the Kersh waiting.” Tokaresh's voice vibrated through her head like it had for the last few years.
With a forced smile Richette rubbed the warm, impossibly smooth scales of his upper forearm. “Lead me?”
A narrow snout settled lovingly atop the human woman's tattered hair, burned unevenly by the fire and other magics she had out maneuvered. “Always.”

Happy Birthday New Story ALLIGATOR!



This is Kyaba's look when I started ranting about NaNoWriMo. It was too cute.

So I decided. I'm going to write a new story. I tried to play with all my ideas and the only one that nibbled was the one that refuses to let me use specifics. So I gave up and started something completely new. And dammit, while I was writing today it made me cry. So SAD! But it's going to be really good. I have a feeling it will be anyways. Evil shapeshifting dragon who's older than the eldest dragon alive plus emotionally tattered heroine who can reach into the magic dimension= potential for awesome. Just today I wrote 3,808 words. So if I keep going like this I'll hit 50,000 in no time!



My in-laws took off the other day. It was really nice to have them around. I think I lucked out with in-laws that aren't super stressful to have in my house. I was a little worried since this is the first time I've had my own house for them to come into. But it was really fun. As you can tell by the look on AssBreakerTony's face they enjoyed the visit too.





ALLIGATOR!!!!!
I remembered my camera AND the cord. So I can show you all the ONE good picture I got of the Alligator before I chickened out and ran away.

Here's the sign by our pond


And here's Le~chomp monster... er I mean... Mr. Alligator.

I had to get to HIS side of the pond for this and when I noticed he was watching me I sorta kinda freaked out and ran away. This is full zoom from 30-35 feet away.

But I'm having issues uploading the video so you guys are just going to have to live without seeing me have the calmest panic attack ever.
However I'm going to double post with a little excerpt from my current NaNoWriMo project so you'll still be entertained. (^_^)

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

NaNoWriMo Panic!

Oh my GOD! NaNoWriMo is in my face and I have too many ideas and a puppy that has to go outside whenever I get into my 'zone'. AAAAAHHHHHH!

So here are my ideas.
1. Rewrite and finish the novel I started last year about dragons and zombies. I know weird combo but it's a really really cool plot. At least it made me happy.

2. Finally pen down the 'hellspawn' story that's been nagging at me for a while.

3. Start a new story based on a dream I had about me and my friends having super powers.

4. There's also this Skyrimm story I started with a friend several years ago. It's on a planet that we created together. There are 14 races and at least 3 made up languages, we have flying motorcycles, floating islands and a war between the Stratta and the Firma. And did I mention there's also huge steam punkish flying ships? Oh yeah.

5. The little kids story about Vampires that rust in the sunlight and are afraid of the dark, werewolves that are super soft and fluffy when they transform along with a near sighted elf and a narcoleptic golem.

*Sigh* I don't know what to do!!!! And I spent so much time fighting with the interwebs in order for it to give me open office so I could actually write!

I'm leaning towards number 2... sorta.

So any input Dazee? Anyone?

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Day 16, First Ten

My in-laws are cool. If I can ever remember both my camera and the usb cord at the same time I might be able to post a picture of my birthday awesomeness. But alas I am perpetually forgetting one thing on my mental lists. I hate lists.

Today is going to be another day on the wheel of the 30 day challenge. Today is also the first day of NANOWRIMO!!!! I think, it was Nov last year. Let me double check.
YES!!! IT IS!!!! *happy dance of joyousness* I'm going to write my story so bloody well this year and none of my characters can stop me!
If you'd like I'd be happy to share snippets of it here and get some honest critique of my redonkulously stupid ideas super fun story!

Alright so day 16 is super easy: put your ipod on shuffle and post the first 10 songs.
Wooooo!

1. Somewhere by Within Temptation. This song always makes me cry.


2. Victems of Science, the device has been modified. I LOOOOVE this song. Is my favorite! one of many anyways.


3. Calling You by Blue October. The theme song to my courtship with Jex.


4. Mother Earth by Within Temptation. This was one of the first songs I heard when we moved to Germany... oh god! that was 9 years ago!!!


5. The Longest Road a deadmou5 remix of a Morgan Page song. The words make little sense except to try and express an emotion. But I like it anyways, it actually inspired a couple of short stories.


6. Valintines Day by Linkin Park. First time I heard this song was just after my grandfather's death. Needless to say I bawled like a little girl. The video is from a final fantasy game I just started.


7.Scars of Time, from Chrono Cross. OH MY GOSH! The memories! When my sister and I were a lot younger we'd play this openening sequince on the playstations in Wal-Fart and pretend we were violen players... then when my sister bought the game we'd constantly 'start a new game' just to see it over again.


8.I lived on the Moon by Kwoon. Good song, it tells a story, the exact story the the video portrays. I like it!


9.Liminality from the .hack series. I like this anime, but I couldn't get into the games at all. The idea of having your consciousness sucked into cyberspace is a really interesting one to me.


10. Yakko's World from Animaniacs. I miss cartoons that were cool AND pretended to teach me something.

Monday, October 31, 2011

A Weirdo is Born!

Happy Birthday to me! I survived another year and now it's time to celebrate with a chocolate overload and some good movies!

Dizzy and AssBreakerTony came up to spend the day with me and bought me a couple of t-shirts and some boots to replace the ones that I can no longer save with shoe goo. We watched the new version of 'The Thing' the other day (sooo good, and so intense!). I'm glad they came up. So is the puppy. I really do have some of the best in-laws ever. Crazy as they can be at times, they're pretty radtastic all around.
Oh and we passed like 50 sweet grass basket stands on the not-mountain-of-pleasant. It was really strange, I've never seen anything like it. Stand upon stand of baskets on both sides of the road... like some kind of wierd basket festival.

Well I was going to put a picture up... but I can't get on the website so pull it up... *Sad Face*
So I'll just share a picture I drew on halloween a few years ago, because it's late and I'll get the fun picture up tomorrow or something.

Done in prismacolor colored pencils! Please give Ashes credit for this if you steal it.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

I'm Halfway through!


So my laptop is on the fritz, I'm going to have to wait to show you my stupid... er... stupendous alligator photos and a video of my having a little bit of a panic attack while trying to get said photos.

In case you guys were wondering about that job I interviewed for, they've been put on a hiring hold till their funding can be calculated for this fiscal year (October is the begining of the new fiscal year for this base). So I might still get it. Maybe, if they can afford to hire anyone. XD!

While I'm enroute to Non-Con at the Green Dragon (my nerdtastic home away from home) I thought I'd pop in and do another day of the 30 day, melt your face off, challenge.
I'MHALFWAYTHROUGH! *happy dance*

So Day 15 is: A picture of something you ate and 10 confessions.

Not so bad this time actually. But what is this timeline for eating, cause I could find all kinds of wonky foods that I've eaten in my lifetime. I'll go with dinner last night because it should make some one giggle.



That's right all I had for dinner last night was Beer with a side of pickles and cheese.
Why you ask?

Because the day for the community oyster fry got moved to the day before and no one told me. *sad face* So by the time dinner came around I didn't have anything ready and I don't eat after 7pm if I can help it and those were the easiest things on hand. All in all though it was a pretty good dinner.

Now for 10 confessions... I don't know how this is supposed to work... bless me Father for I have Sinned???

1. I can't stand realy dramatic movies because I cringe. Not just normal cringing but the gut wrenching kind that makes you feel like you're either going to throw up or turn inside out.

2. I will not cry in front of anyone if I can help it. EVER.

3. This is harder than I thought.

4. At my Christian college I'd dress gothic ever friday that landed on a 13.

5. I'm lazy.

6. I'm also a perfectionist

7. The two above create a vicious cycle. *sad face*

8. Often times I'm envious of my sister in a very Prodigal Son kind of way.

9. I've come to accept the fact that I will forever be 'cute' and not 'bad ass'

10. I steal the little kid suckers that the bank has out on the counter. They make me happy.


Now off to spend many hours geeking it up with some nifty, and a few shady, people. Yay!!!

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Day 13 of the 30 day challenge

I'm stalling with the more interesting stuff that has happened today so that I can get the video online.
But between taking a car sick dog to the vet and rolling myself up in a Kimono in under half an hour, I had a good day.

So the 30 day challenge likes to make you do things that could possibly kill your relationships.
Day 14 is: Write a letter telling some one something that you could never tell them.
And this is where I stand back and go 'hmmmmmm'.
For the most part I live my life to the code of 'If you ask I will tell.' Why? Because it's less stressful that way.
"Do you like my hair hun?" the hubby asks. "It's too freaking short.Don't worry, you're still hot even with stupid hair." The wifey responds.
Most people have heard what I have had to say to them... and what I wouldn't say is probably close to bitching and really depressing. You've been warned.

Rant in 3...


2....


1....

Dear N,
This is old hat but I realize I never said this to your face as clearly as I wanted to. So here it is.
I'm not sorry. We had an understanding, I thought. I wish I could feel less hurt and betrayed but I can't. Just to let you know I have forgiven you and I still love you. But I will NEVER, EVER, I reiterate EVAAAAR let you near Jex again. There were other ways to get his attention and you knew how involved we were. For a while I really really hated you and him and me. That trust can never be completely rebuilt.
~Ashes

Dear Aunt,
You're a witch. Sitting and watching you for the few months I did I was so glad I didn't have to grow up with you. I remember you asking why my super awesome favorite cousin turned out the way she did... well it's pretty much you. At least I can see the soft, broken, human side of grandma. You however, I can't get passed the titanium reinforced casing to see anything. Maybe you've gotten better, maybe you'll get better, but I don't care. If I see you again I'll be cordial and civil but I will not put up with you ever again. I know the hole you wallow in is comfortable but it's damned depressing. I think you'd do better to get out of it and walk in the sunshine of life. God is GOD, if he wants to do a frelling miracle he'll do a frelling miracle! Don't spoon feed people your bull crap about him no longer taking much of an active part of our lives. DON'T tell me the horrifying crap that I experienced as a kid was just a 'night terror'; I didn't choke myself in my sleep, the thing that woke me up wasn't just 'wishful thinking' and the thing it protected me from wasn't 'a hallucenation'. And while I'm at it, LOVE YOUR MOTHER!
Does she deserve it? Not really. She's hurt me emotionally too. But damnit if I can work at loving my mother, and feel bad about trying to hash out things with her about the past because of all the progress she's made, then you can too. While I'm at it, LOVE YOUR FAMILY DAMNIT! Take the time, spend a little gas money, if money is all that tight ask for a little help. If you'd love to see and help us I'm pretty sure we'd love to see you more often. Wouldn't you like to be missed instead of dreaded?
Oh and that email I sent. Not disrespectful. I asked a question straightforward and expected an answer not for you to turn around and email my mother about what a brat I was being. If you're pissed at me tell me you're pissed at me. One day I'll forgive you, because I'll be damned if you make me as bitter as you are. I'm so glad you aren't on facebook, oh God am I glad.
*deep breath* *woo saaa* ~ You're bent neice.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

It happens....




Roar... ?
Since Jex left I've kinda lost my will to do much of anything. I know most of you Veteran married peoples are going to be like 'pshaw you young newliweds and calling each other every day to say "I love you!"' He's only been gone for like 16 days! It doesn't matter I want my evil jerk back! I can't get anything done without him around to keep me on track!
But thanks to my friend the Platypus I decided that I need to give my blog more love. I may even post every other day. *Le~gasp*

I'm so excited it's almost HALLOWEEN!!! Gah! Not only do I get to dress how I wish I could dress every day, but I get candy AND presents (since it's my birthday). In less than a week I'm going to make the most chocolatiest birthday cake EVAAAR! Because if I can't have sex fun on my birthday then I'm going to have chocolate, with little cookie tombstones on top. And when I can't eat it all then Beowulf and Superdude at the Green Dragon (my favorite nerdtastic place in Sandland) will probably appreciate a piece or two.

Lets seee... I think I'm on day 13 of the 30 day challenge...
What do we have here?

Share a Secret, huh?

Oooooh that's a tough one. Most of my secrets are secret for a reason. Hell I'm the girl who when asked "what color are your underware?" by dudes looking to freak me out I pulled the band up from the back and looked at it before answering. I don't even know if I have a secret I can share without feeling all freaked out.

Hmmmmm... *strokes imaginary beard* Uh.....

Okay. I think I got one. Right before going to College I had just broken things off with Jex for a myriad of reasons. Between my Parents saying things like "I will not be a part of something I do not condone" and having communication issues with Jex on top of personality traits he picked up from being deployed to an Army base as support in the desert I just couldn't handle it. Love should not be the cause of so much suffering! DAMNIT!
So when I went to College I was like: Woooo! Fresh start!
It was then that I realized how A-sexual I really am. I just don't care about the opposite sex like I'm supposed to. In all honesty I would rather see a woman's body than I man's mostly because the curves are very artistically pleasing. That and the same woman can change shape based on the time of month or the stress she's under.
There were a few guys I thought were pretty cute, like Cowboy and Ceasar (honest to God that is what people called them) but meh. Get us together with pizza and beer and a few video games or whatever and it'd be a party, but meh.
It was then that I thought that I was forever going to be single. Jex was the only guy that really drew me in... ever. Sure I love the crap out of my guy friends. Oh I love love love them (like Marc!). But not like that. It still feels weird sometimes to admit to myself that I really don't feel feminine or masculine at any given time. I just 'am'. Ya know?
Then, LUCKY ME, Jex took the time and money (and if you knew him you would understand why both of these are monumental considerations) to fly from Japan to Okla-freakin-homa to ask for a second chance. How can anyone say 'no' to that?! Not only that but, well, to be honest even though I broke up with him I'd never really wanted to. He's my one and only, I'm pretty sure there can be no other even if he died. So let's hope he stays alive for a good long time. (^_^) Because if he dies I'm screwed.... or rather the opposite there of.

Friday, October 14, 2011

It's ALIIIIIIIVE!!!!

After the last few days all I can say is: HOLY FRIGGEN CRAP!
Unfortunately my wondermus husband took his camera before we had enough breathing space in which I could pull the pictures off of it. Lame-sauce I know. (and after talking with him on the phone he says he doesn't have it, it may have actually been left at my brother in law's... hmmmm)

Everyone get excited for me, I had my first job interview this passed Wednesday and I think it went pretty well. I'm so excited, I really really want to be a librarian! Yay! ... though technically it's an 'assistant librarian' position... doesn't matter I totally have the glasses for it. (^_^)Y

Alrighty, in celebration of surviving being in different states four weekends in a row I'll do a day of my 30 day challenge.

Day 12: A picture of something you don't like.

Oh the pastabilities... I don't like a lot of things. It's probably easier for me to come up with a list of stuff I don't like than stuff I do like.
But for the sake of my efforts to be more positive I'm just going to choose one.

Strategy board games.... ugh...



I don't like them because I'm bad at them. Honestly I win about 51% of the time. I just don't like them. I feel bad, or bored, or just darn drained after I play them, and since I play games to have fun these are not the games for me.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Day 10: because the internet gods are with me...

I have a head cold! *cough hack wheeze* But that's okay, theraflu is awesome so I should be in the clear in no time.... I hope.
We're still alive. Turns out we're not the only ones with wanderlust. Daddio and Witchy are driving to Texas tomorrow to help sort out all the stuff that was left when Grandma Velma died. But we're here, and in one piece, and with the internet! Yay! I forgot how good it feels to type up a blog post while chillaxing in bed.

Okay so Day 10 of the 30 day challenge is yet another deep/aneurism causing topic: A Story about a past relationship.

*sigh* I'm going to go with a happy story!

There was once a little girl named Ashes, who really wanted some one to play with. She'd look out the window wistfully and watch the leaves on the tremendously tall trees dance in the sunlight.
Soon her mother was going to take her somewhere else, somewhere she could play with kids her own age. It was hard for her to make friends because she wasn't good at showing her feelings with her face or her words. Just her actions. That made the other kids mad. Especially the boys because she could beat them up while keeping her pretty dress clean.
There was another little girl named Aubrey. Who was just as fun and rowdy as Ashes. They had seen each other a lot when they were too tiny to remember and soon they would see each other again.
They would laugh until Ashes got hiccups. Bury toys in the sand box. Spend the nights laughing and playing with all the neat toys that Aubrey's family could afford. They would play catch with a sky dancer and Aubrey would freak out Ashes with a demon possessed Furby (though Aubrie didn't think it was demon possessed). Together they would discover the wonderful terror that came from watching Jurassic Park and having a kitten on a water bed.
Overtime their relationship would grow into the first 'best friend' Ashes had ever known. If they could have predicted the future maybe they would have remained so.
But time is a fickle friend and likes to pull things apart.
Ashes moved to Texas and the girl's mother's had a 'falling out'. Even though they stopped speaking and no longer would call each other their 'best friend' the memories are still precious. The impact still there.
The laughter though long since faded still echoes to this day.

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Dear God, I thank you for giving me the time to blog...

Okay so last night Jex and I got home from our trip to Massachusetts. We're poor, so I packed up all the food from our fridge and we drove over 2,000 miles and 36 hours alltogether so that we could be part of our great friend's big day. I was a bride's maid! *squeeee!*
Missy was beautiful and Shaun was dashing. They really do complete each other and I pray for their continued oneness. Even though Missy is more of a deist than I am she appreciates the sentiment. And somewhere on the internet is a video of Terrace (the maid of honor) and me doing 'the creep' by ourselves on the dance floor. Maybe even one of us head banging to the techno 'Barbra Streisand' song.
Jex and I pulled up to our Apt near 9pm last night. We get today to unpack, repack, and clean before leaving tomorrow night at around 9pm to drive 6 hours to my in-laws. Tony LOVES fright fest at 6flags. Since he's been through open heart surgery this year we're going to celebrate it with him. Then at some indeterminate time we have to drive 6 hours back in order for my husband to fly to someplace to do something for too long away from me for his work. Yay OPSEC! (opsec is the acronym for: Operational Security..... it means don't post military details where just anyone can get a hold of them. And it may make a some of my posts about Jex really vague.)

Anyhow, pictures and other such funness from the trip will have to wait. I've got 5 minutes in which to get home and get things situated.

30 day challenge Day 10: Someone or Something you're proud of.
Holy Crap.... do they do this on purpose. There isn't just one of these things in my life!
Bah, you're about to get a laundry list of photos I can steal from other people's face book pages. *evil laugh*



Marrying Jex... Probably the best decision I've ever made in my life. Ever.



I'm so proud of Norie and Laura and all the other friends that I couldn't find good pictures of



I'm proud that I can put on a Yukata (pictured below) and a Kimono on by myself. A feat that even many Japanese can't accomplish.



I'm super proud of my little brother Rocker. This is a picture of him and his band. He's the only one who looks bad ass (to the left of the kid in the front).... he's also the only American. lol


Well that's it for the next week or so. If there's anything left of me I'll be back here, same bat time, same bat channel.... same batty personality. (^_^) Y


.... I forgot one.... so I came back because this was a really big highlight in my life....

I'm proud of being able to sword fight with real steel. Yup.... it's awesome.

Thursday, September 29, 2011

Day 9: NO!

So I'm about to go and drive 18 hours (plus bathroom breaks and gas stops) to be a bride's maid in my friends Missy and Shaun's wedding. I thought before I disappeared for 4 days I'd do another blog post... Now, however, I am sorely regretting it.
Because Day 9 is: Short term goals for this month.

Seriously, pick the one thing that is nearly impossible for me. Goals for the day I can do, goals for the week are iffy at best, but goals for the month, NO!

*Ahem* But I'll try. Since it's the end of September I'll think about October.
Thinking.....
.......Thinking
Okay, so October is the month my birthday is in..... ummmmmmm....

Got it! I'm going to exercise at least 4 days a week. Go through my closet and get rid of what I don't wear, and get a job! A JOB I SAY! Really I think I might break down and look for a job on craigslist. *sadface*

Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Day 8: Who's your daddy?!

So Day 8 tells me to: Post a picture of some one or something that has had a great impact on you.

No pressure. It's not like when something asks you for a best friend in a public forum or anything.
There are so many ways I could answer this that would make so many people angry.
Yay me!

Hmmmm.... Well I'm actually stupidly impressionable so I'm going to pull a Marianna Annadanna and post a bunch of stuff.


Starting with My Mom and Dad. Because you can't be raised by some one without them impacting you massively. For better or worse I am a amalgam of these two people's quirks, strengths and weaknesses, along with some of my own I invented along the way.




My College Buddies Norie Minegishi and Laura Louda. Oh my gosh I miss you guys almost every single day!


The Chika's I spent the week with in San Antonio. From left to right Brianna Swaim (who I've known since middle school, actually I credit her for my survival in middle school) Pingping, Me, XingYi, and Kamry Murell. Best people to ever spend a weekend alone in a stranger's house with! Gah! I love you guys!


I just love this picture. Brianna and Norie with Thea (Brianna's roommate) and me.


Jesus, Yeshua, Christ... whatever you want to call him. God's son and I'm stickin' to it.



Notice that these aren't in order. I haven't gotten to the stage of life where I'm super organized from the get go.
So, when I was a little kid these were the things that molded my personality and interests the most.

Sailor Moon! No joke I can totally still sing the theme song. I have a few Sailor Moon DVD's that I watch when I get depressed, anyways so my dad sat down one day and watched a little bit with me and in the middle of the episode turns to me and says: "They act like you! No really, all these characters act like you! Especially that Ray girl."
Thanks dad... (-_-)



Dragon Ball Z, I seriously watched this show when I was 7. And boy did I idolize Picccolo (he's the green guy) and future Trunks (the dude with the sword). I have very vivid memories of watching the Freeza saga with my sister and having my first gender crisis. We couldn't for the life of us tell who was a girl and who was a guy till they spoke and even then it was kinda shady.



Here it is. The computer program that made me a nerd for the rest of my life. Thanks to this little baby I decided that I was going to learn every language in the world when I was 7. Yes, the entire world. It also instilled in me a love for culture, especially asian culture for some weird reason. And actually it was Ecarta 94 or 95 but I couldn't find a picture of it online. This one's close enough.