12

Warning: Super Emotional Content

Soft Hearted, Emotional, Crazy, Empathic... call it what you will. I cried when I heard about the Aurora Dark Knight shooting. Then I shoved it all down, said a prayer, and  moved on with the wedding stuff with my sister. After all, I'm in the U.K. my tears won't help their friends or families deal with their loss or get passed the shock of the sudden void in their lives.

Then Elff and Rocker start talking about when they are going to go see Dark Knight Rises. BigBen chimes up and says in his very brittish accent: "Well I'm not sure I want to go, not with all that what happened in Colorado."
My mom assured him that it's not likely, that Aurora is a very shady place to begin with.

Well... I followed some links on Facebook some of my friends posted. Apparently some things that were said by others, namely of the 'Christian' persuasion, really ripped at the soul of a particular blogger. I felt for her, but as is my curse I have a tendency to see from both sides of the fence, there were a few of the quotes that I thought she was maybe  missing the point of (namely the "where are the brave people" quote near the end, I didn't think it was blaming the victims I think it might have been a call for people to see beyond themselves and try to 'save everyone' at the cost of their own safety... but hey I could be reading into it too much myself). I was flustered so I tried to find happier things. How does one respond when one can't give a hug? Or a smile or anything really? I'm a stranger. Sure my family is from Colorado, I have friends there who I love dearly and worry for every time I heard anything about the wild fires (and you too Dazee, but I don't think you're in Colorado). What can I do/say that would mean anything?

Then I found pictures. I'm visual. Images last a lot longer than any other form of input for me. They stir my heart and soul. Maybe you could even say that they make things real.
And I cried again, even though it's been days and these people are complete strangers to me. I'm actually still kinda crying. Because these people will never get to share a laugh again, burn their tongue on coffee or what have you, kiss, hug, get frustrated with traffic. The shooter took away everything the had and everything they would have had (Unforgiven 1992, just in case you're wondering why it sounds kind of familiar).
So I have to say something, even if none of the people effected ever read it, even if Veracity never sees this. Even if it doesn't really matter in the end.

To the wounded in body, mind, and heart,
To the ones robbed of the most precious people,
Even if you don't believe in my God (and I understand completely if you're pissed at him, and I think he does too) I pray for you. My wishes are for you, to find peace, to find freedom from hatred for the man who took so much away, and to live with your memories as treasures instead of chains.
Losing a person is one of the hardest things that gets thrown at us in life; and when you come over this horrific hurdle I hope you will be stronger for it. Not broken but remade.
My tears are for you all who knew the 12 who were taken from this place and into the next. If I could I would also give you a hug, but that would probably creep you out.
All my love, prayers, and hope for you all,
Ashes