Thursday, May 5, 2011

If a blogger blogs and no one reads it...

...is it worth the time it takes to type?
If a ninja falls in the forest does it make a sound?
If Ashes is in CiCi's pizza will she keep score of everyone's pizza crust as if it were some kind of SuperBowl game?

Anyway...

My husband and I have had an interesting few days. Between waking up to a scorpion crawling where nothing has business crawling about, losing Jex's phone for 3 days, finishing an epic nerd game (yes I play dungeons and dragons), having little internet, and then finally Jex getting tuckered out by a 3 year old.

Story #1: The Scorpion.

Technically Jex and I are still considered newly weds. If you can be newly weds after being best friends for nearly 6 years. So, after the usual I was half asleep in bliss when I felt something crawl on my butt. Brushing it off I thought it was just the covers sticking to me a little. Then I felt it on my leg, which was weird, but I still thought it was the sheets. Then I felt it where no bug should ever crawl and there were no sheets there. Something with multiple legs, and roughly the size of a 50 cent piece, was crawling on me under the sheets.
Jex says I was flipping out like a little girl who just saw her doll get eaten by a lawn mower, but I felt like I was flipping out like an adult woman who'd just been violated by a creepy crawly while in her safe place. Somehow while the flipping out was going on I'd flung the creature onto Jex at which point he did a little dance and kicked all the covers back to sit on the end of the bed.
"Turn on the light so we can see what it is." His voice of reason sounded more like a choke.
Oh... right... the light. Reaching overhead I clicked on the light to see...

[[Background: There are only 4 things that reduce me to a flailing screaming mass of girl jello. Jumping spiders that land ON ME. Spider webs (or anything weird) to the face, I'm not talking just a string of web; I'm talking the whole freaking web. Ticks. aaaand.... ]]

... a scorpion crawling around in our bed like it owned the place. I instantly started looking for something witch which to kill it. Jex was more calm and chill about the whole thing. After a second of staring at our midnight assailant Jex asked for my coffee cup (I don't know why it was in the bedroom either), scooped it up, and flushed it. For some reason it didn't have the top half of it's tail, which saved me from a nasty sting as I was shooing it off of me in the covers.
Needless to say I had issues getting back to sleep.

Story 2: Jex's Houdini Phone

It's pretty simple really. My husband and I came in from Sprint training. I started laundry and dinner while he cleaned and rearranged Will's porch. He had his phone when he walked in the door... we have no idea where it went after that. For 3 days it was on, but it wouldn't let me call it. For 3 days we tore apart the car, the bedroom, and the living room. We looked under all the couches, in all the drawers, the bathroom, and under the porches. We dug our hands in beyond the space under cushions and recliners. No matter where we searched it wasn't there.
Today, I was messing with Will's recliner and asked if Jex had checked it. He said he did. Will noticed something reflecting that looked a little weird... it was Jex's phone, chillin' between the upholstery and the cushion where no hand had reached.

Story 3 will be posted on my nerdy blog: epicfailanoobstail for anyone who cares about the Nerd Kingdom.

Story 4: Abri-girl and Jex

Witchy has a granddaughter that has recently come to live with her and Daddio. Her name is Abri-girl, though I just want to call her Bumblebee. She's 3, has a speech delay and super loves Jex. To the point where she monopolizes his time.
As soon as we arrived at Daddio's she had him chasing her around, giving her horsey rides, and generally exerting energy. My husband, the master of play actually had to take a nap.
It was cute. If we ever have kids he'll be a good dad... if he can stay awake. *haha!*

2 comments:

  1. omg, I can't get over the scorpion sharing the bed with you guys. That sounds like the time.....wait, its about bloody clots and could make a good, yet gross post. :)

    I hate it when phones decided they need a vacation from you. Stupid things.

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  2. It's okay, my dad is an ER/Intensive care nurse who would regale us with bloody tales as we ate spaghetti. I wouldn't mind hearing your story. (^_^)

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