Because I'm back, from Outer Space!!!

I can't even remember the last time I posted anything. And you know what I'm just a little too lazy to go and check.

Hello Internet and my Internet Buddies!!!
Like the Phoenix I kind of thought of while naming this blog I completely gave up and now I'm back again.
It is the nature of being me. I'm like the ocean tide or something.

Did you guys know that there's a Super Moon out today!!! I haven't seen it yet. It's also a Black Moon, which is what one calls a new moon if it happens to fall in a month that has already had a new moon.

So I'm back for a bunch of reasons. A) I missed you guys. B) My life is less hectic right now while still being full of fun stuff, and C) I'm going to be a vegan for 6 weeks for reasons I will explain below and decided that I might need to log my journey in a more public forum because I know I'm not the only person in the world going through what I'm going through.


*Ahem* You guys ready for a little bit of a sob story?

Jex and I have been trying to have kids for over 2 years now. Yeah. No big deal, right, we're young maybe we're just not timing things right or whatever. Then my periods and my hormones went absolutely insane. I'm not kidding. I had some serious breakdowns where I felt kind of trapped in my own body watching it ride around on a crazy train while I tried to reassert control. It was all so new and weird and not on any kind of schedule I could figure (even after keeping a food/activity log).  Recently I finally got my butt into a gynecologist's office and they found two little fibroid cysts.
Did you know that fibroid cysts are like little demons that feed on your hormones and mess up all your 'normal' girl stuff? But there's not a whole lot about them on the interwebs. And even my super nice, super straight forward, doc said that there's not a lot of research done about them because they are benign growths that, unless in a bad position or if they get very large, don't really effect one's over all health.
They'll make you crazy and randomly bleed for no reason, but they won't effect anything else.

I know that the food in this country is all kinds of bad. How? Because I didn't grow up in this country and because I  left the country for 2 1/2 weeks in December and came back.
What the hell does that have to do with knowing the food in America is TRASH? I'm glad you asked.
When I first returned to the U.S. I got sick, really sick, so sick I had multiple infections and was forcing myself not to throw up on the regular.
Nope, I wasn't eating McDonald's or any of the greasy offerings that the University Cafeteria had to offer. I was eating salads, veggies, meats, and cheeses that my friend's would buy and I would cook up. I was eating healthy and it still wrecked my system so badly I had to go on antibiotics.
I just figured that was from 10 years of being away from all the molds, pollens, you know the environment or whatever.
Well it happened again, to a lesser degree, when I came back just a couple of weeks ago. I feel like shit, pardon my french. I have no energy, I threw up a lot the first week back 'home', and I wasn't eating anything stupid. I made stirfry with brown rice and ate veggie omelettes with hormone free cheese. I'm not eating potato chips or boxes of hamburger helper and cheap mac-n-cheese and I feel awful.

So, I'm going to try and cleanse my system. As well as get a freaking job to pay for the-must-be-gold-plated-because-this-price-is-ridiculous CSA organics I want/need to get my hands on this year.
I did a little bit of research. Mostly talking with friends who have changed their diets and had a lot of success. It looks like going vegan for 3 weeks, doing a weekend cleanse, then going back to vegan for 3 more weeks is the path I'm going to try.
All the veggies are going to cost me a fortune, because I won't buy anything non-organic and I'm doing my best to identify and avoid GMO's but that's harder to figure out. But like my dude says: Which is more expensive; hospital visits or food?

Pintrest is kind of my best friend. Why? Because I can't eat soy. In small quantities it's ok but it can't be a big part of my diet. And that is where 80% of vegan recipe's get their protein. Ugh.
But there's a great board on Pintrest full of gluten-free soy-free recipes. Thank GOD!
Also because I'm a meat and potatoes girl. I don't do the above mentioned crap. Give me a steak and a baked potato covered in bacon and cheese and I'm a happy camper. I don't feel right without a slice of bacon, sausage, leftover steak, with breakfast. I don't eat fruit if I can help it, though oranges are nice. As logic would have it all my recipes reflect this. Vegan is so totally opposite my usual diet that I honestly got anxious simply thinking about it.

Also, there's this image that one associates with vegans. You all know what I'm talking about. That one person who turns their nose up at anything offered them because it's not their diet. They 'don't eat anything with a face' or 'I don't exploit animals' or whatever crazy crap you assume will come out of their yoga pants wearing, size 2, sickly skinny, hemp smelling face.  Somehow they come off as looking down on you as an inferior/ primitive human being. (Note: I have since met a really sweet, cool, vegan so I know not all ya'll are like this)
^ I am not that person! ^
Frankly I don't really even want to be associated with those people. But it's something I feel like I need to do. If for no other reason than to force myself to find places that sell more fun veggies, please I just want my celery root and kohlrabi, in this land devoid of natural grocers and to learn which producers use GMO and which don't. To force me to get creative with my dinners instead of the rut I've dug myself comfortably into. And maybe to get and keep my hormones in check since I have two little demons hanging out in my uterus.

So, send me your positivity, well wishes, and/or prayers, please; because this is probably going to be the most difficult thing I've done in my life. I don't even know what to do with quinoa or how to even pronounce it. I remember my mom used to eat it with milk or something. I don't know! And this post is already so long I think I'll talk about my activity plan tomorrow or the next day.

Anywho, I wish you all the best in your own endeavors.
Remember~ The light heart lives long.

Sunshine Trip: Day 3

We woke up to babies. Apparently tiny people don't need sleep like big people do. They had kept Cait up all night and then decided to be done with Druid and Faeriman's spare bedroom.
Which was really lame because we'd decided to sleep until late that day. You know not get up at the ass crack of dawn and get on the road as the first few tendrils of light are shining IN YOUR FACE. But what had to be done had to be done.
This turned out to be the day of God's timing.
I also think this is the day we heard Drunk Grandma preaching on the radio... if it's not it's close enough...
Anycrazydesertradioprograms, we got on the road and made good time. Everything was going along swimmingly. No really. The babies realized that they were going to be in their seats for longer than they wanted to and simply dealt with it. Nymnym was still kinda afraid of the trailer but she'd stopped sitting on my head when I was in back with the babies.
I think this is also the day that Jex sat in back with the babies. He did amazingly well for a dude who is still a little weirded out by tiny humans. He still won't touch a diaper though, wuss.

We got to our dusk fill up and discovered that Jex had completely rearranged the back seat. There were spaces on either side of the car seat because of the way they sat in the Explorer. He'd filled those spaces up to give the person in the middle more leg room. Nice. But we'd have to roll down the windows to get the babies out. Not a problem actually. The car seats held the kids up just about even with the window ledge so it wasn't too bad.
We filled up, changed diapers, got much needed caffeine. Everything was going swimmingly, there was even grass for Nymnym to pee on... oh that right I didn't tell you, when we got to the desert Nymnym wouldn't pee because there was no grass. We're pretty sure she held her bladder for an entire state, maybe even a state and a half.

We started to pull out and I rolled up the windows, most of them anyways. You see, Kitten's window wouldn't roll up. Jex and Cait were trying to wiggle it and force it and everything as I pulled slowly out of the truck stop. Nothing was working. Which was strange because we've never had problems with that window, ever.
Kitten is his father's son, it gets to be 70 degrees and the boy gets shivery. And it was fast approaching night time, in the desert, in December. So after a while we pulled over and tried to fix the window.
We dissected it and called AssbreakerTony when we couldn't figure out what the crap was going on. There was also this little beagle hound mix little squatty legged dog that kept trying to steal Jex's tools and come home with us. To add some craptastic frosting to the frustration cake we pulled over near a railroad crossing. Between the conductor purposefully (oh it was totally on purpose) blowing the horn to freak us out (and it worked I shrieked and jumped in a full circle before figuring out what happened. Apparently train horns turn off my intelligent brain and replaces it with Derp) but when we were troubleshooting the window with Tony trains would come by and make it near impossible to hear him.

Day turned to night. Then the phone started to die.

Luckily my husband is made of awesome. He used to be an electrician and we just happened to have a length of copper wire left over from trying to fix the tail lights on the trailer.
Jex hotwired the window.
I'm not kidding. It was great and amazing and there was much rejoicing.

So we climb back into the car and go to get back on the highway and the highway is a parking lot. Jex says it's ok because the access road will take us all the way into Gallup, where we've decided we will be eating dinner.
Why was the highway a parkinglot? Another wreck. But here is where it turns into some super rad, this can't just be coincidence, stuff. When we pulled over Cait was watching the road when the lights on the highway went all crazy. If we hadn't pulled over we probably would have been in that wreck.
Not only that but the delay made it possible for us to eat at Grandma's Burritos in Gallup (that's really the name of the town, it's in New Mexico. I usually don't use town names because OPSEC is burned into my brain. But no, if you ever go through I want you to know the best place to eat EVER!). Which was amazing.
Adovado with green chili. Best thing in the universe next to fresh Tirimisu and German Goulash. 

We ended up driving through the night because it made sense and the babies were being awesome. And it was good, for a while.

The light heart lives long~

In the Cardboard Castle

~*~
I live in a cardboard castle.
All sandy brown walls.
Filled with little trinkets and winding narrow halls.
~*~

Ugh, all that's left is the kitchen and finishing up the office/computer room. Towers of boxes line every corner. We even ran out of boxes so I have to go raid the grocers in the area for some more. I'm tires of tape, the smell of sharpie, and carboard cuts (because I have all the grace of a newborn giraffe).

Sony and Paladin are due to arrive tonight. Tomorrow night is the last time I can get together with my 2 beautiful ladies. Cait! Manda! I'm going to miss you guys!!!
Mannnn... now I'm going to get all sad.
I've been trying to stay positive. Moving just means new sights, more adventures, different and amazing people and things to discover. I have the Dirty Girl to look forward to. And no household chores for at least a week after the deep cleaning of the apartment is done.

And maybe, just maybe, when I find the rhythem of my new sphere I'll get back to joining in the madness with my fellow Bloggers.
Honestly though I have a bad feeling about this move. I pray that it's a false alarm and this move turns out to be super positive and good for us. *knock on wood*



Side note:
I don't know about the rest of you... but I'm not liking the new Blogger interface.
It feels like Windows 3.5... and the first few versions of the internet in the early 90's... bleh.

PCS season is here again!

PCS= permanent change of station. It's a military term that, like with most military terms, is slightly stupid because 'permanent' usually means between 8 months to 4 years. It's a grand adventure to be sure, full of trouble, danger, monsters, and daring escapes.

It was a normal day in Sandy Land, hotter than God and brighter than any day has a reason to be. Jex sat at his desk doing his normal jobish things, secret and not so secret, when lo and behold the orders he had been waiting 2 years for get thrown on his lap. Sure they were half done and taped together in weird places, and were those teeth marks on the corner? It mattered not for the orders dictated that he find an apartment in a weeks time so that he could move to Sandy Land in two weeks.
Oh dear. Jex called upon his wife to run the red chariot around Sandy Land to find them a home worth living in. A place that was price worthy (prieswert, a german term since the english equivalent is evading me... ha ha alliteration), would allow a loyal furry companion, and within bicycle distance of the Great Fortress.
Wiffer Wife prevailed and found them a lovely place on the third floor. Open and perfect in size for all their Shtuff.

The couple then travelled to Jex's ancestral home of Podunk in the Georgia Mountains to procure all the Shtuff that William had been keeping in trust especially for this day. Finding a great chariot at a good price the family proceeded to load their Stuff for departure.

However, no one knew of the nest that hummed just below William's front gate. The great chariot was nearly full when Flying Beasts began to attack the family. Assbreaker Tony killed many with his mighty Cosmo, but too late. One of the black creatures assailed Jex and stung him under the eye! Jex killed the beast and asked for his wife's aid before the eye that was attacked swelled shut. It didn't help that one of the beasts had gotten Wiffer Wife's hand earlier that week and it was swollen like a balloon.
Will and Dizzy went for reinforcements. Nothing more could be done till the nest of Flying Beasts was destroyed (damn wasps). Lo, while they were gathering cavalry a great gust blew a mighty storm onto Will's little home and stranded him and Dizzy in the torrent. Jex despaired that the great chariot would ever be filled.
But they prevailed! With the chariot full Jex attached rinky the dinky red chariot to the back and began the long journey to Sandy Land. The fell storm found them on the way and made the roads slick. Other chariots travelling the same path crashed into one another, and the PoPo was out en masse for what the couple did not know.
Finally, at their destination Jex made to get the rinky red chariot off the great chariot so they could unload. But Rinky was Dead! Oh no, not Rinky! (stupid cheap battery)
Luckily a Security Forces enlistee was there to help at Wiffer Wife's pitiful plee for help.
Jex and Ashes, aka Wiffer Wife, hauled 6,000lbs of Shtuff to the 3rd floor. Jex carried a couch up the stairs by himself (and he looked soooo hot doing it!). Luckily the man who lived across the way was kind enough to help them get the last couch in the home.

All was well with Jex and Ashes, they had their place, away from the ancestral stomping grounds were the in-laws lived. Then more orders dropped in Jex's lap, these were covered in red tape and stupid sauce. He was to ship out for the Forbidden North, to train for more secret and not so secret stuff the Fortress needed from him. He was to leave his wife and be gone for nearly 4 moons! Ashes was not happy, but it had to be done. After living in Sandy Land for only 6 days Jex was taken to the Forbidden North and Ashes was left in the flaming hot Sandy Land, knowing no one and no thing familiar.
..... to be continued....

So yes, that is where we are right now. I am keeping busy though. Mountains of boxes don't unpack themselves. Maybe I can get pictures up when they're all gone!
Also I'm looking for a job to offset the massive amount of money I have to spend come September. Yay bride's maid dress! Hooray Within Temptation concert! AHHHH! I'm so excited!!!! *ahem*
I'll catch up with everyone and everything when life finds a rhythm. Till then: love many, trust few, and always paddle your own canoe!
(God I love Spell Check!)

The Gypsy Wife moves again!

Since I've been married I've lived in 5 states, 3 houses, and 3 extended stay hotels... did I mention that I've only been married for nearly 2 years?
The time has come again to move back to South Carolina. All this week until Sunday Jex and I will be breathing fire at our copious amount of stuff or each other while we get everything ready for the move. I probably won't have internet, but by batman's pointed helmet I'm going to do my best to keep tally of the not-so-funny-at-the-time stuff that will make me laugh later.
Sunday is driving day. Monday is fill the apartment with boxes day! I've already been promised awesomeness if I can get everything unpacked and in a logical 'home' within a week of filling the place with boxes.
Think I can do it? *shifty eyes*
Ja ne! At least until I can get the internet hooked up in our new home.