To blog a Blogger

Dear Bloggers that I folow~
I would've commented on all the fine blogs that you have posted this week, if I could. Blogger is having some technical difficulties recently and are working on the problem. I just wanted to let you guys know that I still luv you and enjoy reading what you take the time to type up. Thanks for making the internet a better place.
~Ashes
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The Tailbone is healing.
I'm back to being knee deep in the NerdKingdom once again. This time in the little side provence of BellStrong Jex, Will, and I are taking turns running the awesome nerdness! I recount most the adventures in my other blog for anyone who's curious. Tomorrow the entire Baker's dozen of us are getting together for a day filled with fun: after nearly a month apart. Yay! And I don't have to cook this time! *happy face*

Speaking of cooking I discovered this morning that I have no talent for gravy making.
My mom has always made gravy with cornstarch. Jex is okay with it, but he grew up with the down home southern white gravy made with flour that could pretty much be a meal in of itself. Me being the kinda sorta new wife that I am jump at every opportunity to make something he likes. The first time I made white gravy it had the consistancy of jello. This morning I tried again and I was left with dough.
Okay, no problem I'll just add more milk. Then it resembled overcooked oatmeal. Uhhhh... more milk? The result: Soup.
Setting aside the pan I decided to just make french toast, something I knew I could do. In the end I ate the should-have-been-gravy with toast. At least it tasted good.

Dash like a Warrior!

I've been waiting patiently for photos to be posted online so that I could have an epic montage of warrior awesome, including my flaming red Koolaide hair from the previous post.
ALAS, I have been duped yet again! Yes they took my picture, no problem, but now I have to pay anywhere from 20 to 50 bucks to own said pictures. Yeah right.

Luckily I have an awesome husband who remembered to bring his camera and took some good pictures of us.



Without further ado; my tail of daring Dashing as a Warrior.

Camo shirt: check. The only pair of shorts I don't mind ruining: check (dang these things are shorter than I remembered!). Trashy socks: Come to think of it most my socks have holes in them.
I had everything ready for the big race. Jex and I had been training for over a month so that I didn't die. My goal was modest: finish the 5k obstacle race (technically 3.2 but who's measuring?) in the top 25%. Get a fuzzy viking hat and free ice cold beer, and maybe a turkey leg.
We arrived early. My husband, my brother-in-law Will, and I were a little excited. Till Will saw the climbing wall. He wasn't too keen on that particular obstacle. There were so many people dressed sooo weird. And some just plain cool.
Like this guy.

and this guy.

After getting the lay of the land, and a few dorky before shots, we got our running gear (bibs and timing chips)and got ready for our wave.
We were in the second to last wave on the last day of the race. There was a beefy man dressed like William Wallace in sweats, A school girl, and another (more convincing) William Wallace kilt and all in our group... oh yeah and a dude in a pink prom dress with his buddy in a suit with a mullet wig. Ooookaaaaay.
The announcer guy counted us down and flames shot out from the top of the 'Start' sign and we were off like a heard of freaked out sheep. Including me because my leg got caught up in the ribbon that had been tied across the starting line a moment before. We ran down hill as a thundering pack, then up a small hill people started dwindling behind me. Including sweatpants William Wallace, as muscular as he was I thought he was some big health nut; nope turns out his muscles were just for show.
Around the bend when the road went from paved to gravel a few passed me but even more stopped running. The walk through the shallow of the lake dropped more. Then over the wrecked cars and through the field of tires. I felt like I was running in the postapocalyptic backdrop of a zombie flick. It was awesome! I climbed over walls, ran through mud and scraped the crap out of my knees. The slide was the only thing that hurt. That tarp down the side of the hill that they were spraying down with water hid all rocks; but it's okay my tailbone found them. By the time I got to the last mudpit I thought I'd done really good for myself and passed another two contestants. Woo! Through the last little lake and over the logs in the way and the finish line made of fire was MINE!


Afterwards we felt sore, amazing, I somehow got mud on my teeth and didn't notice, and we all loved the ice cold free beer. Yes, I am a Warrior. I made the 3.2 miles in 28minutes and 49 seconds, including obstacles. Maybe I'm bragging a little bit. *Innocent Face*
Will after the dash.
My man! (who made it in 22minutes; gah he makes me look bad! *laughs*)
Water. Good.

Adventures in Hairdying: The Box is a Lie!!!

My hair was yellow... the box said it would turn even the darkest hair a platinum color. LIES! I had auburn hair, not even black hair. It turned yellow. I died it again with the same dye. No change.
I got sick of it. So I grabbed a nice ginger looking color off the shelf per my husband's request that I not dye it Purple. What color am I now you ask? FLAMING JEAN GREY RED, it looks like a hyper 4 year old dumped a pot of cherry koolaide over the top of my highlighter yellow hair and only half the color soaked in.
THE BOX IS A LIE!!!! All those little swatches on the side that show you what your results will be based on the shade of your hair, lies all of them. Computer enhancements to make you think you picked out something nice. As of right now unless I'm going for something super funky (blue streaks dangit!) I'm not touching the hair dye anymore. My adventures in this are over... for now.

Happy Mother's Day!!!

I want to wish all the mommies who read my blog a Happy Mother's Day! I hope today is filled with pampering and lavishings of love from those you brought into the world and those you painstakingly raised, or are currently raising.

Especially Chicken; she's been something like an internet mommy to me because she encouraged me when I was taking my first baby blogger steps.

You guys are the absolute best!

Warm fuzzy wishes ~Ashes

Past Blasting

OH MY GOSH! *squeeeeeee*
My best friend from elementary school just contacted me via FaceBook! Memories of him were the things that got me through middleschool and gave me hope for finding friends in highschool after running up against those people that make one into a puddle of self doubting goo. So, for him to suddenly reappear! *excited girl scream* I'm so excited to see what CM has been up to and do the whole 'catch up' dance. Yay!

I think Jex is a little jealous. He made a pouty face when I told him CM was one of my best friends, my first true best friend. Jex has been my best friend for 6 years and will be for the rest of my life; but this new comer, who's throne Jex technically usurped, is a threat. *laughs* I'll just have to remember to give Jex a little extra attention.

If a blogger blogs and no one reads it...

...is it worth the time it takes to type?
If a ninja falls in the forest does it make a sound?
If Ashes is in CiCi's pizza will she keep score of everyone's pizza crust as if it were some kind of SuperBowl game?

Anyway...

My husband and I have had an interesting few days. Between waking up to a scorpion crawling where nothing has business crawling about, losing Jex's phone for 3 days, finishing an epic nerd game (yes I play dungeons and dragons), having little internet, and then finally Jex getting tuckered out by a 3 year old.

Story #1: The Scorpion.

Technically Jex and I are still considered newly weds. If you can be newly weds after being best friends for nearly 6 years. So, after the usual I was half asleep in bliss when I felt something crawl on my butt. Brushing it off I thought it was just the covers sticking to me a little. Then I felt it on my leg, which was weird, but I still thought it was the sheets. Then I felt it where no bug should ever crawl and there were no sheets there. Something with multiple legs, and roughly the size of a 50 cent piece, was crawling on me under the sheets.
Jex says I was flipping out like a little girl who just saw her doll get eaten by a lawn mower, but I felt like I was flipping out like an adult woman who'd just been violated by a creepy crawly while in her safe place. Somehow while the flipping out was going on I'd flung the creature onto Jex at which point he did a little dance and kicked all the covers back to sit on the end of the bed.
"Turn on the light so we can see what it is." His voice of reason sounded more like a choke.
Oh... right... the light. Reaching overhead I clicked on the light to see...

[[Background: There are only 4 things that reduce me to a flailing screaming mass of girl jello. Jumping spiders that land ON ME. Spider webs (or anything weird) to the face, I'm not talking just a string of web; I'm talking the whole freaking web. Ticks. aaaand.... ]]

... a scorpion crawling around in our bed like it owned the place. I instantly started looking for something witch which to kill it. Jex was more calm and chill about the whole thing. After a second of staring at our midnight assailant Jex asked for my coffee cup (I don't know why it was in the bedroom either), scooped it up, and flushed it. For some reason it didn't have the top half of it's tail, which saved me from a nasty sting as I was shooing it off of me in the covers.
Needless to say I had issues getting back to sleep.

Story 2: Jex's Houdini Phone

It's pretty simple really. My husband and I came in from Sprint training. I started laundry and dinner while he cleaned and rearranged Will's porch. He had his phone when he walked in the door... we have no idea where it went after that. For 3 days it was on, but it wouldn't let me call it. For 3 days we tore apart the car, the bedroom, and the living room. We looked under all the couches, in all the drawers, the bathroom, and under the porches. We dug our hands in beyond the space under cushions and recliners. No matter where we searched it wasn't there.
Today, I was messing with Will's recliner and asked if Jex had checked it. He said he did. Will noticed something reflecting that looked a little weird... it was Jex's phone, chillin' between the upholstery and the cushion where no hand had reached.

Story 3 will be posted on my nerdy blog: epicfailanoobstail for anyone who cares about the Nerd Kingdom.

Story 4: Abri-girl and Jex

Witchy has a granddaughter that has recently come to live with her and Daddio. Her name is Abri-girl, though I just want to call her Bumblebee. She's 3, has a speech delay and super loves Jex. To the point where she monopolizes his time.
As soon as we arrived at Daddio's she had him chasing her around, giving her horsey rides, and generally exerting energy. My husband, the master of play actually had to take a nap.
It was cute. If we ever have kids he'll be a good dad... if he can stay awake. *haha!*