Thursday, February 17, 2011

Because I Can

I don't like being in the spotlight.
My blog only has like 8 followers and I know most all of you very closely.
I'm not funny or interesting enough to get a large following and that's ok with me. Average has it's virtues. Besides I'm afraid that if I was I'd have to wade through comments and delete a lot of stupid people notes.

But! I'm all for improving myself and one thing I have a problem with is being in the spotlight. I don't know what happened. I went from a 3 year old who could tell anyone anything, do a little dance, and love pictures, to a 13 year old who was so terrified of other people that she couldn't even ask a question of the sweet looking teenage girl cashier at Taco Bell (I wasn't familiar with what a Quesadilla was), to a moderately confident young woman who is great with groups of 10 or less and of those 10 she has to know at least 3 otherwise she'll try and plaster her self to the wall. So when I heard about the Spring Fashion show at the BX I thought: Hey, that's one step I can take to overcoming my weird hang ups.

So today at 5:30 I get to do a rehearsal run (in heels!) and then on Saturday it's the show. I don't expect more than about 15 or 20 people to be in the audience, but who knows. And since my beautiful friend has demanded photos I'll go ahead and link my possibly horrifying experience forever captured here for all to gawk and giggle over.


  1. I'm all for breaking the status quo and getting over oddities that are nearly paralyzing. Good on ya.

  2. Hi Ashes-I think it is great that you recognized an opportunity and went for it. Also, don't underestimate yourself-people want to read what you have to say. And I think for almost all of us (I would say Hyperboleandahalf and a few others are definite exception to the rule) it takes time to build blogging relationships. And you know what else Ashes? I'm getting into a really long dissertation here and I'm going to continue it over at my place. Give me some time-it might take me the night between dinner/bedtime etc. and then please come visit. I'll pour us a glass of wine. (or soda). We'll have a chat.

  3. Good for you!! That has to be very very hard. You will do fine. standing ovation

  4. Come visit me Ashes! I have a surprise for you!

  5. I get this...completely.
    I used to be that shy awkward child. Never said a peep in class. It's hard to find your voice and to feel that it's strong enough to belong...and my friend it is strong. What you have to say is so important. You are important. You don't need numbers to tell you that...the fact that the people who do follow you are close is worth more than 100 bazillion followers who barely know you.
    Keep writing. Let that voice be heard.

  6. came to visit but still didn't get your surprise It was on the post beneath the one you commented on. Here is the link

    How did the show go?