Of Apartment Hunting and Government Websites

Of Apartment Hunting...

I'm in South Carolina right now, hunting for a place to live come August 1st. I really enjoy the mobility of the Military, I mean where else do you get two weeks notice to pack your life up into the back of a truck and find a new pad? *laughs*

This leads me to find the joys of hunting for the right place to live. I'm used to base housing; one size fits most and usually a few years out of date but good. The commander of personnel says: "Hmmm you and your dependent are authorized up to a two bedroom." And you go pick the least abused flat available.
I'm not used to lists of amenities, pet fees, security deposits, paying 3 months rent up front (yeah, I thought that was a little much, too) and application fees. Nor renting a place that has less space in the kitchen than the little extended stay hotel room I find myself typing from for nearly 1,000 a month (including internet, television, and utilities).
While listening to hyped up reasons why whatever apartment I was standing in was the one for me I kept trying to think of the right questions to ask. I nearly made a cultural blunder and luckily caught myself in time (though I probably looked a little special as I stared at the ceiling for a moment half way through my sentence).
After hearing the price I almost asked: Hot or Cold? In Germany that phrase means: Hot= All utilities are included in the rent price or Cold= none of the utilities are covered in the rent price you have to get that squared away yourself. Hehe.
I think we've found a good place. It's open, though small, and close enough to base that we can ride our bikes everywhere we need to go. AND it's right across the street from a little Korean market! My next adventure will be getting electricity turned on! yay?

... and Government Websites.

When we get up here I want to have a job within a few weeks. I've been going stir crazy being home all by my lonely without much to take care of. So it would be great if I could get a job on base so that I could drive to work with Jex when the weather was bad or we just didn't feel like riding bikes (because Americans will TAKE YOU OUT if you ride on the street).
To get a job on base I have to go to this website and make a profile so they can make sure I'm not a terrorist and stuff.
Problem: Stupid website only accepts phone numbers in American format... most all my work experience is overseas.
More Problems: It wants me to have a current employer... unless you count my dictator (I love you hunny) husband I don't have one.

So I've decided to try and find my old resume and type it up (because dangit I want to work at the library!) and for current employer I'm going to stick "husband". And when the guy/gal interviewing me asks why all the phone numbers are hollywood numbers (you know 555-XXXX) I'm just going to tell him/her that the website made me do it.

I might just start using that on a regular basis to get a rise out of people. Hehe.
Cop: "Why are you taping ribbon dancers to all the car antennae?"
Ashes: *cute innocent face* "The website made me do it." *smile*

.... yeah, I think I'd just get arrested, too.